Uncertainty. What a dirty word.
Not that I’m all that concerned about words that got my mouth washed out with soap when I was a child. That shit just doesn’t matter to me like it does to my mom.
What matters right now is how much I was trained to associate competence with Knowing, with being Certain:
- Of the answer.
- Of what’s happened.
- Of what to do in the future.
But I don’t know The Answer. Yeah 2 + 2 = 4 (but is that true in other galaxies?). I know the time I got up today (513am) but not the myriad of dynamics that affected my sleep and my daughter’s and partners. What we ate, when we napped (or didn’t), metabolizing stresses and joys…
Wow, so much uncertainty that comes when we’re aware of the complex dynamics of inner and outer living!
And what to in the future? Hahahaha.
Makes me wonder if they still teach creating a Five Year Business Plan as part of getting an MBA still.
So how does competence fit here, then, if not on getting the test about the future correct?
For me, I believe that my Real Skills stack up and structurally support my resilience. Competence with real skills matters now… and I actually do know they will matter even more in my future (and ours).
It also feels like this past year (and my whole lifetime) I’ve watched as arrogant “experts” have asserted what is going to happen – for sure this time! – only to see it NOT happen.
Uncertainty can be embraced… for our thriving!
While I still require pretty regular revisiting and reassurance, my mind is accepting that it is in the uncertainty that thriving grows. No, I don’t mean uncertainty about essentials. Survival living is HARD, and I want a healthy dose of certainty for all humans around water, food, clothing, shelter, and love.
Beyond those essentials, there’s a vast field of Potentials, uncertain who or whether they will be manifest. Being in the improvisation of life is NOT a sign of incompetence. Indeed, it feel like an incredibly wise and resourceful real skill to cultivate – for me, for we, for our children, for our thriving.
I'm curious how the pursuit of certainty affects you, and how embracing a bit more improv into your intentions feels to the different parts of you. Would you be willing to share?