Fresh Fears

Fresh Fears

A Fresh Fear is activated when we are confronted by a situation that is new or has never-before-experienced aspects to it. Our primitive brain doesn’t know what to do, so it signals a potential threat… and we feel fear.

This fear almost always arises when we’re changing and expressing ourselves in new ways. It’s one of the reasons change is scary.

Even though the situation is fresh to us, the primitive brain will try to “default” to interpreting this threat like it is something old and well-known. But this is often painfully unhelpful. We can end up feeling scared – sometimes far more scared than we can handle (or that makes realistic sense).

  • We learn to discern what is challenging from what is an actual threat.
  • We break old patterns and beliefs that no longer serve us.
  • We build resilience NOW, with what we want to do that matters – even if it scares us initially.

With fears of all kinds, EFT Tapping is a useful tool to address the fear energy and give it a new direction – towards calm confidence. Tapping also has a way of bringing to the surface how we might need a new frame of reference or how we’re getting derailed by a Magical Misconception or two.

By staying focused on what is freshly threatening about the situation (and not assuming it’s just always something from our childhood or past trauma), we are more likely to be able to adapt and keep the energy moving freely.

Exposure to Criticism

Let’s say you want to put your heartistry where others can share it. Yay!

And then you read a comment on someone else’s work that you really like that is harsh, demeaning, and cruel.

Days later, when you’re about to post your work, you can’t! You feel this panic. You’re frozen and want to not do this!!!

Now, with real skill, you start to inquire. Using the questions, you might discover that you picture after posting and wanting to celebrate that some jerk-face is the first to comment, and they hate it!

Tap tap tap.

The truth is that when we offer anything of ourselves visibly, judgment and criticism are a part of the landscape. Just as there are mosquitos heavy in certain places, less in others, and none in a few special places, we can both pick and choose the spaces and access we want to offer – especially as we’re building our calm confidence – and we can also explore our boundaries around criticism.

In response to such criticism, an influential thought leader, Seth Godin, says: ** “That’s okay. I didn’t make it for you.”** That frame can help A LOT!

Also, do we need to accept or consider feedback that is NOT kind and helpful? Perhaps rotten tomatoes are best for the compost pile, not our salad.

Do you get the idea? By looking at what we’re not “ready” for, we can build resilience where needed, have a more confidence-inspiring frame of reference, and yeah, also heal past traumas directly related to this fresh fear.

Yes, we want you to feel free to express your Heartistry!

Success Would Mean Life Changes

It’s true. When we’re successful in fresh ways or even get close to being successful, fresh fears can arise.

Some of those fresh fears are absolutely grounded in reality. We’ll need to prepare and adapt.

For example, money changes our world. If all your friends are paycheck-to-paycheck, your business success will mean an energetic change. We’re not saying that you won’t still consider them friends. But every human’s primitive brain has a “status” circuit, and when our status might go down, we get the fresh fear of being left out. When our status might go up, we can have the fresh fear of… not being considered one of the group anymore.

As much as we focus on emotional freedom for all and want to co-create we-spaces where the energy of shared contribution and wisdom predominates, humans remain wired for status. We so appreciate those who can develop the real skill of recognizing the fears that arise from our monkey mind around status and seek ways to stay calm and confident anyway.

Useful Questions

  • Rather than assuming I know what I’m afraid of here, I’m curious; what about this situation is something I’ve not run into before?
  • To actually do what I’m fearing, what change do I imagine would be required of me?
  • Is my primitive brain amplifying the ACTUAL risk to me here, beyond where it is in reality?
  • Is the fresh fear coming from something emotionally risky? Psychologically? Financially?
  • Am I concerned about how others will treat me… or how I will treat myself?
  • As I imagine being successful in this situation, is there something in that image that is scary, repulsive, or absolutely NOT a Yes for me?

Resources

Related Concepts

Primitive Brain, Trauma, Subconscious Blocks, Confidence Zone


Contributors: @Rick

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