Emotional skills are practical... REAL Skills

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Yes, the most common and difficult problems we face in life are emotional.

Do you want to create? Is the challenge REALLY putting paint to canvas or fingers to keyboard (musical or computer)?

I was a writer at 4! I started with a manual typewriter. It took me a few hours… that’s it… to figure out where the letters were and how hard to strike them to get a clean image on the paper.

Once upon a time there was a man named Noah,
and he had a lot of poop to deal with on his boat.

I get on a call with over 300 people and when someone says “I don’t feel like I’m enough!” the number of heads the nod and eyes that water tells me, bluntly, we have as a community emotional blocks to being co-creative.

It’s NOT that we cannot bring something to life.
It’s that we’re afraid to share.
We’re afraid of the energy we’ll get back…

Why are we afraid of the energy we’ll get back when we share our creations?

My theory is that our existing social and emotional learning inhales violently. (It sucks.)

Tell a child, “Hey, I love your enthusiasm but not right in my face and not so loud for me right now.”

What do they do with that? Shut down? Get angry?

I used to shut down. Developing emotional skills let me feel – deep in my core – that enthusiasm isn’t always a good fit for everyone all the time. It isn’t always and all ways consensual. AND THAT’S OKAY!

C’mon, Let’s Go create spaces where our particular enthusiasm is a perfect fit! Let’s practice, together, the emotional skills that allow for Resilient Creativity.

I am raising my kids to be Co-Creatives, resilient and emotionally free while also being considerate, understanding We-Spaces, and all that kind of good stuff for a thriving life.

More than anything, I believe that the emotional skills are the real ones they will benefit most from mastering. Every investment we make it helping them grasp and practice and see and sense them makes for a brighter future for them… and everyone they touch.

I sooooo appreciate that YOU are here, with me, this Now. And I’d love to hear from you about what real emotional skills you’re practicing and where you are noticing they are making the kind of difference in your world that matters to you. :heart_decoration:

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I was just reading an excerpt of the book and could identify and FEEL so much of what he was saying that I purchased it.

How I FEEL emotionally is more important then most physical pains I’ve experienced in my lifetime. The anxieties, fears, panic, depression, sadness - all of these have been so much more painful than any surgery I’ve had. I’ve been surrounded by people who are shut down that communicating with them about true feelings is impossible!! IMPOSSIBLE! I’m so glad for this community center where I can express how I feel.

Music has meant a lot to me over the years but I have actually shut down listening to it because there are so many emotions attached to it that for now I need to keep from feeling because I am afraid to be overwhelmed. I also feel a little bit of this as I think about reading this book.

So here goes … I probably will have more to say.

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Wisdom.

Thank you.

I know that some people are not emotional feelers, or their emotional dance is utterly different from mine – spectrum wise.

And I know that suppression has been The Way for so many and it’s had really painful impacts on those who are emotional feelers and Sensitives.

I’d like to imagine that what we’re doing here is co-create space where emotional engagement becomes valued as Real Skills and experienced as pleasurable and supported.

Love you! Thank you!

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“Music has meant a lot to me over the years but I have actually shut down listening to it because there are so many emotions attached to it that for now I need to keep from feeling because I am afraid to be overwhelmed.”

I do the same thing, Jean. I haven’t really listened to music except sporadically for over 7 years now. Thank you for sharing this, I feel so much less alone in that regard.

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I was wondering how to open up to listening to the music I’ve loved in the past without getting overwhelmed. I remember when I went through Primal Scream therapy how we’d play music that meant a lot to us in order to get us to cry. It sure didn’t take much. Songs like All By Myself by Eric Carmen. Holy crap, I was debating about posting the You Tube video of it when it started playing and I felt the emotions… No thanks, not today.

What songs activate you Margo? I have a whole list. And no you are definitely not alone in this.

Specifically, the song All of Me by John Legend is pretty hard to listen to. Then there are all the songs that remind me of different people. I have a ton of songs I associate with certain people. As I said to a friend, it seems like almost every song is “I love you so much I can’t live without you” or “My heart is broken”. A lot of music leaves me feeling really lonely and “other”.

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Most songs play to our attachment issues. Very few are “Hey that was great, you’re awesome, and I see we’re headed in different directions and I wish you all the best!”

Perhaps that’s why I am enjoying songs in languages I don’t even know… like Iroquois!

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Thanks for making me laugh!

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That’s lovely music.

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And this is the perfect moment to look for solace in the attachment issues and emotional trauma expressed by a good(?) country song. Here are some great titles to get ya’ll started on your healing journey. You’re welcome.

I Flushed You from the Toilets of My Heart
I Wouldn’t Take Her to a Dogfight (Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win)
You Can’t Have Your Kate and Edith Too
If the Phone Don’t Ring, Baby, You’ll Know It’s Me
I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Just Like Having You Around
Thank God And Greyhound You’re Gone
You’re The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly
When You Leave Walk Out Backwards, So I’ll Think You’re Walking In
She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger
I Can’t Get Over You (Till You Get Out from Under Him)

And here’s one that I came up with the title for a few years back but haven’t written (yet):

I Must Be Right Out Of Your Mind

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::rofl::rofl::rofl: Funny, make up some more :wink:

I know at least 3 of those are real song titles!

If the Phone Don’t Ring…
Thank God and Greyhound
She got the Ring

Glenn, are the rest real, too? (except the very last one)

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Yes, they’re all recorded songs…lol. The last one, my song title, is partially real because I just remembered some friends of mine who had a country band (The Pony Club) wrote and recorded a CD and one of the songs used that line that I gave them…lol. And since that makes it practically real I’m saying it makes me practically real too…and practically famous as well!!

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Uh oh, I didn’t realize they were real songs. I thought you and your imagination were having fun creating. :grinning:

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My mom’s favorite (and she didn’t listen to country, but heard it somewhere) was “Teach Me to Cheat”.

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We never liked Country Music until we got into Citizens Band radio. The people we talked to had what were called CB Breaks where we’d all meet up and dance. It was the first time I started socializing. I remember when we were dancing to Country Music we said to each other that we never thought we’d be dancing to this kind of music. It was during the time of Urban Cowboy. I liked “Looking For Love in All the Wrong Places” and “She Don’t Know She’s Beautiful”

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