I’ve read this quote 4-5 times in the last month. It’s hard for me because, well, a lot of my clients were not mothered in any kind of healthy way. For many abandonment, punishment, and worse are the kind of “mothering” they recognize.
It’s one of the reasons I’ve used Re-Parenting as the invitation for healing complex trauma from childhood.
In that context, the hope is that we activate more of the “natural mothering instinct” within all of us (of any gender) to recognize that, yes, punishment is counterproductive. Hatred and abandonment betray the core essence of a parent’s role in a child’s life.
I’ve needed to re-parent “little Ricky” – and not because my Mom was abusive. In my case divorce and an evil stepmother left me at times mal-adapting to “abandonment” (which is a felt experience even if it can be argued I was never abandoned).
For those of us who really have become quite different parents (and embodied loving beings) than we grew up around, this invitation to re-parenting of self can be a potent doorway into healing and restoration.
I’m grateful to @Cathy for encouraging (and even being insistent) that re-parenting could make a significant difference. She was core in co-developing Inner Tapping which is an EFT Tapping approach that combines tapping, surrogate tapping, and re-parenting.
Happy to answer questions and explore together how we use this approach for ourselves… and how it changes our parenting now.