Self-care amidst outer world upheaval

Thriving Together
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Overwhelmed or outraged or anxious about things happening in the news?

Friendly reminder to tend to your nervous system and take care of your sweet self.
:yin_yang::sparkling_heart::yin_yang:

Take some deep breaths of fresh air.
Drink some water.
Shake it out in a dance party.
Practice meditation, qigong, yoga, and/or EFT tapping to re-center yourself.
Listen to calming music or nature sounds.
Hug someone for at least 30 seconds, or exchange foot rubs or a back massage.
Take a bath or shower.
Take a media break; don’t keep refreshing your screen for the latest updates.
Cook and eat a nourishing, healthy meal.
Go for a walk. Move your body.
Journal to clear your mind, and to shift your attention to gratitude and trust.
Breathe deep into your belly and affirm your safety in your body in this moment.

It is ok to take care of yourself.

The world needs more calm, centered, resourced people amidst the chaos.

The better we tend to our own nervous systems, the more sustainable our energy will be to do the work that is needed co-create a more peaceful, just, respectful world in which we all can thrive. :peace_symbol:

*How do you need to tend to yourself with gentleness today?

Allow that to happen!*

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These are all great, nourishing suggestions to have a positive impact on your mood/body. To me, tending to myself with gentleness would look like giving myself permission to feel my emotions and have it be ok. I have a hard time allowing myself to do this because I have an incessant inner critic and judge myself for feeling sad. Trying to tap through it. But yeah just giving yourself permission to feel what you feel and accept and know it’s ok if you’re scared or sad or angry or whatever and not judge it as good or bad. Maybe easier said than done. I can say that it’s ok to feel these things but my body still yells DANGER DANGER no it is Not! Especially if someone has discredited/dismissed/invalidated your feelings in the past. Example: "men shouldn’t cry. " (which is preposterous) but because of this stereotype many men don’t feel safe to express their sadness. It’s difficult to work through your feelings if you don’t feel them. :confused:

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@Cathy taught me to start with tapping to THANK you inner critic for being on the lookout for sadness that might “wash me away” until I was ready and supported enough to be with those feelings.

“Even though I have really hated you - my inner critic - I’m starting to realize how much you love me and actually want to keep me from the DANGER of emotions that might be too much for me!”

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Today, after the horror of yesterday, I was called to Morro Bay to re-ground and re-balance my somewhat battered nervous system. Walking along the shore, looking for a sand dollar for a friend, and breathing in the sea air…just what I needed!

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Yes, giving ourselves Permission To Feel is vital— especially if that permission was denied by others in the past, or now by our own inner critic.

And, it’s much easier to do that if we know we have some skills to Be With the feelings that arise… more gently, easily, fully, compassionately… So that the body won’t have to yell DANGER quite so loudly when we do give ourselves permission to feel… As we gain skills, it’s easier to trust that it’s ok.

I suspect that a large part of why our parents/teachers/ancestors tended to deny us permission to feel our feelings is because they lacked the skills to Be With Feelings too — in themselves and in us, when we were little people with big feelings.

And so it got passed down and internalized, so that it’s harder to give ourselves permission, and we have to work harder now to develop the skills to Be With our feelings without being overwhelmed by them.

Growing our skills to Feel, to be present with our feelings and let/help them move through, seems to me a key aspect of creating a more peaceful, respectful, empowering world.

Tapping is one very useful skill, and I’ve found the Daoist embodiment practices to be very powerful too — qigong movements, meditations, breathwork and healing sounds — all energetic skills that help it feel safer to Be With feelings and let them pass through, like the natural weather patterns they are.

When we have skills to Be With our Feelings, and consistently remind ourselves (& each other) of that, we get better at it, and it becomes less scary. Our bodies don’t have to have quite as strong a danger response when we have energy skills we can trust to help us through challenging moments. (I see that with my son a lot!)

I trust that we contribute to co-creating a better world by practicing such energetic skills as often as we can, however imperfectly, and by giving ourselves permission to feel and share our experiences in ways that allow others to feel safe in the process too.

Thank you for being part of that co-creation and actively choosing new ways of Being! :purple_heart:

(I wonder, sometimes, if part of the upheaval of this past year is allowing us to grow into these skills better than we would otherwise…)

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Thank you dear circle members for this discussion and thank you Rick for this guidance. Badly needed this approach to making friends with inner critic. Inspite of having conceptual understanding of valuing my amygdala, this guidance from you not only acknowledges my understanding but also helps me give permission to self of the same.

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I’m so glad Tanvi, and it’s GREAT to have you here with us!

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Welcome Tanvi ~ it’s so good to have you in our Circle!

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