Recalling the Simple Uplifts
If we want to remember the simple uplifts, we can either let that happen by default, by accident, or we can take some positive steps to remember them.
Listening to a lecture in college, I realized how little of it stuck with me. I needed to take notes. The act of taking notes created a portal between looking at the note and what was happening at the time I took the note. It allowed for recall.
None of us are surprised if someone says, well, if you want to learn the material, you need to study it. If you want to learn a skill, you need to practice it. Repetition and recall are important parts about learning anything.
And yet, to be real, there are so many moments that I don’t take notes on. And after a while, they’re gone. They’re as gone from my brain as Calculus 3… gone, only the vaguest recollection.
We have a photo frame in our kitchen. And the truth is that if I look at it, the memory gets reactivated. Like spaced repetition, the thousands of photos there eventually show up again. And that moment in time is recalled again… imperfectly, but recalled.
My invitation is when someone says, oh, make a gratitude list. That might feel really flat to you. Like, OK, I’m grateful. Why do I need to make a list? And here’s what I’ve noticed.
For about 200 days I’ve made it a consistent act that I end my day recalling some simple uplifts.
That feeling of my daughter who’s listening with headphones to a story on her iPad that I’ve heard so many times… she gets up from the floor. She climbs onto the sofa where I’m doing some work on my laptop. And she turns her back and leans against me as naturally and as easily as an almost five-year-old can do.
I’d like to think that I would recall that moment “by default.” It was so sweet! But I was in the middle of something. I was focused on my work, and I registered it for a second or two. But then that evening, when she was asleep already, I looked at my list. What do I want to remember and recall that I’m grateful for?
And maybe it’s just a word, just a word, or maybe it’s a more detailed description. And in that recall, at the end of my day, what I notice is that even the next morning, I have more of a full-bodied memory. It’s not just a picture, and it’s not just words. I can actually feel her right up against me, warm and happy, immersed in a story of her choosing and also connected to her Dada.
I don’t know what life is throwing at you right now. And I don’t know what the weather is like where you are — emotionally, physically, ecologically. I don’t.
I do know that for those of us that want to be thriving anyway, taking the time to recall, letting the memory on multiple levels re-imprint on our energy, does send a signal to our mind: “Remember this! Move it to long-term storage. Keep it for our future. Keep it for our future. Our future self will be grateful.”
It’s not a perfect system. As I go back and look at my list recorded back on day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, I don’t even know what I was talking about sometimes. The specifics are less available than I would like and yet I get a deeper sense of myself. My present self is really grateful to my past self who started a difficult (for me) practice and made it profoundly useful to me… now.
Gratitude at the end of days long past supports my Thriving… NOW.
I’m creating inside of me memories that are more enduring than they would be without that practice. Try it… if it matters to you on the rainy days to be able to recall and feel the sunny mornings. You will find it easier, and increasingly more natural, once you’ve devoted practice to this for 100 days or more.
Useful Concepts for Thriving in This Story
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Simple Uplifts
Everyday moments can renew us when we notice them and bring them back to mind. -
Future Self
What we practice now becomes a gift our later self can rely on. -
Activation Energy
Beginning a daily recall takes a small push that makes the habit possible. -
Practical
A simple end-of-day list turns gratitude into something we can actually do. -
Thriving
Choosing what helps us remember sweetness supports a life we want to keep living.