This morning I opened my email and found a story from Chicken Soup for the Soul that I subscribe to. It wasn’t the story that caught my eye it was this: "Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you. - Oprah Winfrey.
Bingo! Something went off in my thoughts. Back in the 1970s I learned that something I always called “my problem” got a name. It was Agoraphobia. I also heard about self-help groups and got excited about starting one in the area I lived at the time. So I put an ad in the newspaper asking if anyone would be interested in a self-help group for people who couldn’t leave their homes and had panic and anxiety in public places. I received a handful of letters including one from a group who already had their own group. They said they would help me get a group started if I would come to one of their meetings. Me come to a meeting in Miami? I lived in West Palm at the time. But I felt passionate! My mother was agoraphobic too and I wanted to help both of us. So being terrified, my husband drove me to Miami and when I walked into the meeting they were flabbergasted! Yes they helped me start the group Agoraphobics Anonymous. I’m not writing this to brag but passion drove me to do some really scary things.
Wanting to live a fuller, less scary life I felt passionate to seek ways to “overcome” panic and anxiety. I wish I could say that I am where I want to be in my seeking. Yes I learned a lot about myself and tapping gave me some wonderful tools to use.
I feel passionate about writing these blogs, but I want to explore more of what makes me excited enough to explore more ideas about what makes me feel passionate. A lot of it has to do with people pleasing and all the past programming about what a wife “should” do and be. I’ve been exploring this more lately. I remember my first astrology reading suggested that I discover all the talents I had and be more selfish. I had NO idea how to do this and it felt wrong. I felt like I “gave my life away” to make others happy. But maybe this was my path and it’s ok. This video explains more succinctly. Do we have to be more selfish to feel passion? I wonder.