Letting Beauty Influence Us

 Real Skills Workshop - Community Event

RS 2021-09-12 Beauty-1200x630

Letting Beauty Influence Us

Real Skills Workshop: Thriving Lifestyle

Hosts: Rick Wilkes (@Rick) and Cathy Vartuli (@Cathy)

Recorded Sun Sep 12, 2021

:point_right: See session replay below


Do you pause and let beauty influence your emotional energy?

I gotta admit that sitting in front of the computer so much, it can really keep me from noticing. Yet…

Our thriving needs beauty. And we know beauty by letting it influence us.

When we let beauty IN, it’s like eating something delicious. It affects our sense of fullness. There’s sweetness. Our life feels more solid and whole.

There’s an archaic version of me that would insist, “Who has time for that?!?!” Poor guy. Yeah, he had more money and also was dying from lack of loveliness.

When we have a practice to take a powerful pause and allow beauty to reach our inner being, we’re nourished.

I understand why that’s hard. I understand personally and professionally what blocks us from letting beauty influence us.

Our next Real Skills Workshop will help you clear those blocks and let you more easily cultivate moments of beautiful influence on your body, mind, and spiritual connection. Cathy and I hope you’ll join us!

Sign up for the Real Skills Workshop we are holding on Sep 12th. (Yes, you’ll also get the recording.)

Please, if you CAN support the workshop with a payment of $7.11+ – it matters and Thank you!

If you can’t… by all means still join us for free, as our honored guest.

We know that beauty is essential for our thriving. Our Nature is designed to take sips of beautiful energy throughout our day.

:point_right: See session replay below

P.S. Adira says, “I see you! Will you let my beauty and your beauty influence how we smile today?”


Unfortunately I won’t be able to attend live as that is the day of my brother’s Celebration Of Life…

That picture of Adira is SO perfect…holy smokes it makes my heart fill with joy!!


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We’ll miss you, and thanks for catching the date issue – I changed it in the message to Sun 12th. Ooops!


Abundance is an Essential Nutrient

When we do not feel abundant, life can feel oppressive, stressful, and bleak.

We’re DESIGNED as humans to notice beauty, to feel good about what we have that serves our well-being and feel inspired by the beauty in Nature and what is crafted by the human heart.

When we notice beauty and actually ALLOW it to influence us, it provides us an essential nutrient for our thriving.

I so wish this was still natural for us.

Fact is that when we’re stressed, it’s DISTRACTIONS we go towards… not beauty. We are far more skilled at zoning out or worrying than we are at actively changing our vibration to feel… abundant.

On my walk this morning, I saw a magnificent mushroom (picture at bottom). Wow. A true fruit of the forest – although I know not whether any mammal should actually eat it. Doesn’t matter. It’s aliveness, it’s beauty… activated me.

By activated I mean that my body chemistry changed. My nervous system felt excited… and curious… and calmer, too.

When we do not get enough Vitamin C in our diet, we get scurvy: a disease characterized by spongy gums, loosening of the teeth, and a bleeding into the skin and mucous membranes. Egads! How horrible!

What characterizes a lack of the essential emotional nutrient of Abundance? Hopelessness. Flatness. Loss of motivation. Inability to take action. Lack of inspiration. Low vitality. Rare smiles. Dis-eases. Egads! How horrible!

Truth is, when I was sickest and most miserable I was NOT taking time to let beauty influence my state of being. I had so many beautiful things and people… yet, no skill at beautifying my energy and allowing abundance to be my vibe.

Gratefully, I’m not that being anymore.

Carol Look played a significant role in really making the vibration of abundance a core part of my thriving lifestyle. As she says, abundance is not an amount in your bank account. If the feeling of abundance is really lacking in your life, I do heartily recommend that you take three weeks and six group sessions with Carol starting next week to clear the blocks and change your energy.

Learn more and sign up here for Carol’s Abundance Program.

Cathy and I will be doing our part to help you let beauty influence your emotions in our next Real Skills Workshop this Sunday. We hope you’ll join us!

:point_right: See session replay below


…and let the beauty of those things deeply influence your sense of well-being…


Beauty is Unattractive

Ugly assertions. Bad news. Threats amplified. Hype and hypocrisy. Crassness and clickbait.

All these get way more clicks… attract more attention… than an invitation to enjoy a moment of simple beauty.

It’s almost as if we’ve made fear attractive and beauty unattractive.

That’s so weird. That’s so toxic to our psyche.

I wish I wasn’t susceptible. But the noise is so loud and pervasive, like the sounds of sirens when trying to meditate.

Cathy and I do not have a “solution.”

We do have some practices that we’ve learned that have, quite honestly, gotten us through some rough periods – including the last 18 months.

If you join us for this session, she might even tell you about her flock of hummingbirds. Yeah, sometimes you have to put out some regular sweetness in order to have some beauty buzz into your world.

I’ll leave it at that. Join if it’s a YES for you. And thank you for being someone who cares enough about beauty and community to be a part of our world right now.

Love to you…

:point_right: See session replay below

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Letting Beauty Influence Us - Session Recording

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Letting Beauty Influence Us
[00:00:00] Letting beauty influence us. Hmm. Hey look like looking at the face of my co-creator Kathy. so much, so many hours that we’ve spent together and exploring and, um, you know, things that are really difficult, like beauty and what makes beauty such a difficult subject for so many people. I’m actually really excited about this topic when you first proposed it.
[00:00:37] I was like, okay. I don’t know. It doesn’t sound very exciting to me, but the more we talked about it and started diving in and it, Rick and I often invite the universe to send us what we should share. And I happened to watch this amazing video about how our survival brain works differently when it’s reactive and how we actually sense things differently.
[00:01:00] So I was like, oh my goodness, we can actually influence how we feel and how we experience the world by noticing things. So I was just, uh, I want to share I Kelly to share that, but I think that we can, by noticing beauty, we have the chance to influence. Our viewpoint, our perspective in the world and to give, uh, give ourselves more choice and freedom.
[00:01:23] And I think that’s like, wow. I always thought it was self-indulgent. I was kind of brought up that, oh, it’s kind of indulgent to have beauty and pleasure in your life. You should just tough it out and go through it. Maybe you’ll get a little bit at the end and that’s not really how I want to live my life.
[00:01:38] So I’m really glad that you brought this topic up, Rick. Yeah, like you said, sometimes the universe gives us lessons as we’re preparing for this kind of student teacher experience and the chat is open. Um, and also if you’re looking at the replay, uh, we invite you to reply below with ideas and questions and your own experiences too.
[00:02:04] Um, I’ve noticed, for example, um, been going on a little mile, walk in nature, and I can tell like if I’m in my primitive brain and there are certain things like a baby screaming for 30 minutes straight, that just like my nervous system, I, it just gets activated. And so like, I get narrower and I get more like, Choppy.
[00:02:36] Like if you were to feel my energy, it’s not fluid, it’s not moving, it’s choppy. And like, my field of vision actually comes down. Now, when you’ve, you’ve been walking for nearly 300 days straight, you kind of notice when your eyes are taking in the whole trail and you notice when you’re like, just like trying to make sure you don’t step on a snake, right?
[00:03:03] Like that’s where you are at. And the other day, and this morning too. So two days I noticed that on the walk out, I tend to walk half mile to a mile out and then walk back. There was no inventory in my brain about like beautiful things that I had noticed. I know that I let kind of like them flicker by like, oh, that’s nice.
[00:03:34] But the whole idea of what we’ve come together for is to let beauty actually influence us. And I can say that when I’m in that kind of cadence of like, okay, I’m out here, you know, and I’m narrow that I’m not noticing. So this morning I noticed that, like, I just kept walking for almost a mile out. I really felt like, gosh, you know, there’s really not much to notice.
[00:04:06] I did notice the dog poop, literally the dog poop that was in the trail I noticed, and I did not step in it, which is a sign that I was actually walking on the trail and paying attention because if I’m like my stressed out self elsewhere, I would’ve stepped in it. Cause there was, you had to step around it, very narrow trail, big pile.
[00:04:31] Um, but when I turned and, and, uh, headed back. I started noticing there was something that shifted when I paused, I took a powerful pause and just like, okay, I’m not noticing anything beautiful. And I have a call today on this subject. Maybe it’s time for me to pause. And so I paused and I allowed myself to ground a bit more and I turned around and I took like four steps.
[00:05:02] And I’d like to, I’d like to share a screen here if I can.
[00:05:11] Now this is, this is really tiny, a little tiny mushroom. Now I could never have designed something quite so beautiful. There’s a little tiny thing growing behind it. It had just pushed up through some leaves or these sticks and Moss and a blade of grass and a little rock. Um, and again, if I had stayed in my mode that I was in, I, I wouldn’t have noticed that.
[00:05:45] And so by, by switching gears from a place where I wasn’t noticing to a place of noticing, and that wasn’t the only thing, um, on the way back, I can feel kind of in my energy field about eight different things, including like this mountain, Laurel, but just had this really, like, it had been through a lot, like this Mount Morell had been through a lot, but it was vibrant still.
[00:06:18] And I, I kinda, it was, it was strong and I could stretch my shoulders, holding onto it, feel the bark deal. It’s a liveliness. And so that’s why I feel like this is a nutrient duty as a nutrient. And it’s just like, I’ve got vitamin C in my cabinet. If I don’t actually take it in, it’s not going to influence me.
[00:06:49] Can we do some tapping on the resistance? Cause I can feel some. Um, and I, I just want to normalize it. I think that a lot of us in normal times let beauty and a lot better when we’re under a lot of stress. COVID times have been incredibly stressful. Every place we look news talking to a friend, Facebook, whenever danger, danger, there’s threats, we don’t know what’s going on.
[00:07:11] We don’t know who to trust. There’s not going to be enough. Like there’s a lot coming at us and our brain. We only have so many resources to, to, to evaluate the universe, to look. We only have so much attention. And so our brain is going to always, our survival brain is always going to gear towards looking for deals.
[00:07:32] It’s always going to want to filter their beauty and pleasure are not in the danger zone. We can’t, we can only go go there when our we’re more calm. So if you feel some resistance to allowing beauty realize your survival brain is probably really scared right now. So karate chop, even though I don’t want to look at any beauty right now, even though I don’t want to look at any beauty right now.
[00:07:59] Yeah. I’m getting my dopamine response from finding where the danger is. I’m getting my dopamine response from seeing where the danger is. My limbic system does not want to shift. And my limbic system does not want to shift. Maybe I’m actually safer than I think maybe I’m actually safer than I think. And my safety, my perspective.
[00:08:28] By shifting my perspective. I can shift my attention. I can shift my attention and calm my limbic system down and call my limbic system down. It feels top of the head. It feels so uncomfortable to notice beauty right now, I feel so uncomfortable to notice beauty right now. I don’t even want to be on this call.
[00:08:53] I don’t even want to be on this call side of the I, my survival brain is really geared towards danger right now. My survival brain is really geared toward danger. Now it thinks that it’s a waste of energy and time to look at beauty. It thinks it’s a waste of energy and time to look at beauty under the nose, but I’m getting really depleted, just noticing danger all the time.
[00:09:19] You’re getting really depleted, just noticing danger all the time. 10. I want to have that fulfilling warmth when I noticed. I want to have that fulfilling warmth. When I notice pleasure collarbone, I want to notice the lovely things around me that give me energy, wants to notice lovely things around me that can give me energy.
[00:09:44] It feels really hard to shift from danger to beauty. It feels really hard to shift from danger to beauty top of the head. And maybe I can make a few small steps towards that today, and maybe I can make a few small steps toward that today. Take a nice deep breath.
[00:10:06] And I’d just like to remind people, um, There’s only a few things we can control when we’re triggered or activated. Um, if we, if we’re scared of restart going into freeze mode or flight mode or fight mode, our heart will naturally be faster. We can’t control the w really we can’t directly control that.
[00:10:26] Well, if we go, if it goes down or not, our hands will often sweat, our stomach will get upset. We don’t have direct access to control that we do have control over the speed of our breath, which could also feel very, I feel a lot of resistance when I’m activated to doing slowly breath. So I’m like, I don’t want to, I need to breathe really fast so I can fight this thing off or whatever.
[00:10:50] I don’t know why I’m doing growly voices today. Um, but, um, we do have some control over that, but the muscles are often weak for us, our muscles for like, I’m going to take nice, slow breaths. I’m going to help my system calm down in terms of what we noticed. We do actually have control over where we draw our attention.
[00:11:12] So we are going to be geared towards seeing danger around us, but we can, if we can let ourselves notice a few beautiful things, we’re helping our system shift from that danger focus to a safe and relaxed, you know, somebody who wouldn’t notice more. And there really is a shift when our survival, when our, our survival brain or primitive brain is in reactive mode, we hear differently.
[00:11:40] We see differently, we smell differently. We taste differently. I remember the first time I tapped ever, I had one of those one minute miracles. I’d been really stressed. I’ve been, um, suicidal, just struggling so badly for years. And I did about 10 minutes of tapping and it was. Oh, that was never my fault.
[00:12:00] It just peeled it away. And literally the lights and the colors came on in the room. All of a sudden I was, it was like from this dark kind of heavy feeling everywhere, I was like, there’s beautiful colors in here. There’s lights. We actually see differently. And we can invite ourselves to step into that by the slow breaths.
[00:12:20] My noticing beauty, we can influence our survival brain very, very directly, even if it feels uncomfortable and we’re learning how to do that, but we don’t necessarily have our muscles in shape for that. Does that make sense? That was, but it’s, it’s this isn’t knowledge. That’s widely understood. Um, you reinforced that for me.
[00:12:45] Like, oh, we actually see differently. We actually hear you. You had mentioned to me the other day that the mid range frequencies, um, we start losing those. We’re starting to pick up, um, the higher, the growl kind of energy, as well as the, the shrieky warning kind of Sirene kind of energy. You know, when I’m listening to someone singing that’s pleasing to me, it’s the mid range.
[00:13:18] That’s actually like, oh, I feel so good. And it’s interesting that for, I’m assuming they’ve really tested this, that, um, that mid range, our sense of smell and our sense of taste. Well, guess what? So if, if you’re about to eat something that’s really beautifully delicious, I’m not, I’m not even talking about something.
[00:13:42] That’s like, it’s okay. It’s galleries. I’m talking about something that you find beautifully delicious, but you’re stressed. It is going to taste different to you than if you’re in. If you calm yourself down a little bit and confidence yourself up by that, the more present. And so, you know that this. And hearing Pappy talk about it.
[00:14:10] I’m aware how hard it can be. And I believe that when we get together as a community, as a circle and we reinforce, look, this is hard to shift out of primitive brain, you know, we’re, we’re not working against, but there’s a reality of, you know, a hundred thousand years of evolution. Um, the, the resistance that we have, um, the, the lack of prioritization that we, we have, um, And yeah, go ahead.
[00:14:45] Oh, I put in, I think I spelled his name wrong in the type, but I put in a chat, a link to a video that Stephen Porges, who’s a very well-known poly bagel researcher put it has some of this references in it, but he does, like, you were talking about how it’s hard to shift. He’s he his point in, and he makes him this video as well, is that our survival brain is geared.
[00:15:11] It’s going to preferentially look for danger because if it’s wrong, it would rather look for danger than safety. Because if it’s wrong, you still are more likely to survive than if you’re looking at safety. You’re like doing the fun, playful things. When the trying to start as Rex was about to eat you or something like that, if that makes sense, let’s do some more tapping.
[00:15:31] And if you’re new to tapping. Thriving now.com/tapping is a free guide. Um, just we’re tapping on the side of the hand, um, which used to be called the karate chop point, um, which we’ll still call it that sometimes, even though this is hard, even though this is hard, there’s so much threat, it feels like, it feels like there’s so much threat.
[00:15:59] My primitive brain is so aware. My primitive brain is so aware. People, people closest to me, people closest to me, Bayfield threatened. They feel threatened, uncertain, uncertain, scared, scared. Don’t I have to be paying attention to all the threats. Don’t I have to be paying attention to all the threats. I can afford a dose of beauty.
[00:16:29] I can’t afford a desert beauty eyebrow. Can I, can I, out of the, I don’t, I have to stay focused on all the things don’t. I have to stay threat focused on all the threats. It’s hard to come out of that mode. It’s hard to come out of that mode. It is hard to come out of that mode. It is hard to come out of that mode.
[00:16:52] Uh, we, humans are forgotten how to come out of that mode. We humans have forgotten that. It was one thing when it was just the morning paper, it was one thing was just learning paper. Now it’s everywhere. It’s everywhere. All day long, all day long, all night long humans are forgetting how to come out of that mode.
[00:17:21] We, humans are forgetting how to come out of that load.
[00:17:29] One of the things that I’ll do when I’m in that mode, after I’ve walked a bit like movement, right. Even if it’s got a sense of Peyton’s of some like, uh, um, if you look at a deer that’s just been chased by. A tiger and gotten away. You’ll notice that they start this progression and then they’ll kind of like, shake it off.
[00:17:58] I get it. Doesn’t look, it it’s, it looks very kind of spastic because they’re really unwinding a life or death kind of chase. And so I will, I will do, you know, shake my body off, stomp my feet a little bit. Why? Because I’m a mammal and you know, if I want to remember how to shift out of this, we can go back to now, if that’s not good for your body, you can, you can do something that feels like, oh God, ah, Ooh.
[00:18:35] Um, something that lets your body. One of the reasons we tap and use our body is that it’s sending a signal into that limbic system. That even if we’re stressed, even if we’re alert, activated, um, it’s actually okay for us to not be running for our life, that we’re actually able to be sending a signal. Hey, Hey, Hey.
[00:19:01] Hey. It’s okay. It’s okay. Well, this is not actually a tiger. That actually a tiger. This is not actually a tiger. This is not actually a tiger. And there are safe moments are safe moments, even 17 seconds, even 17 seconds.
[00:19:26] It’s okay to down-regulate. It’s okay to downregulate okay. To down-regulate. It’s okay to downregulate. And then notice something.
[00:19:44] Just notice, just notice something. It doesn’t have to be orgasmic. It doesn’t have to be orgasmic. Uh,
[00:20:01] I’d love to, for you to notice as Rick is inviting you to downregulate and notice the beauty, what do you notice in your body? What sensations do you have in your body? I noticed a kind of heaviness in my chest and my muscles were a little tight. There’s nothing wrong with that. Just if you can notice and be with that for a moment, it might help you shift through it.
[00:20:23] Um, and I’m really drawn. I’ve been working with my mother is moving and she’s very, very stressed right now because she’s trying to move a very large house to a smaller place. Rick’s laughing because he’s heard me, he’s supported me through many afternoons. Imagine what you think is very stressed and then multiply it by a billion.
[00:20:48] Since have it contained in one human being that close to your mama. Yeah, it is. And I have a lot of compassion. She doesn’t have these skills. She doesn’t understand how important they are, but I was when you were tapping on just the noticing, I realized that growing up, she’s always been this stressed and her survival brain, her judgment of where we should focus.
[00:21:13] Our attention is very much on being careful, avoiding dis difficulty, struggling. It w the, the stress, the very stressed focus. And anytime we were, I remember playing and occasionally she’d be fine with it, but often there was like a watch out, be careful what are other people thinking? So she was, there was social pressure.
[00:21:37] And I would imagine many of us were brought up in families where there was a lot of trauma, unresolved trauma, and toxicity. So for a lot of us, our natural child playful self is like, oh, look at that pretty thing. Let me play with this thing. That feels good. And there was probably, I’d love to do a little tapping on that.
[00:21:54] Okay. With you, Rick. Um, we weren’t encouraged to, so karate chop, even though I probably have a natural desire to notice beauty, even though I’m almost certain, I have a natural desire to notice people. And my little self was trying really hard.
[00:22:19] She, or he didn’t have a good chance to get some of the forces around them. They either don’t have a good chance around some of those forces. There was a lot of pressure to be on time and be organized and be safe, all that pressure to be on time, to be organized, safe. Notice the danger, notice the danger ranger, Rick and my parents were sometimes really annoyed when I just wanted to be blissed out.
[00:22:52] Sometimes my parents were really annoyed if I just want it to be blessed out teachers for me, top of the head, I didn’t have a lot of permission to notice beauty. I didn’t have a lot of permission to notice beauty or invitation. It seemed very indulgent to them. It seemed very indulgent to them.
[00:23:18] A waste of time and energy under the eye and from their perspective, that was really true. And from their perspective, that was really true under the nose. But I know I’m safer than they think they are. I don’t know. I’m safer than they think are Jim. And I’d really like to invite beauty into my life. I really need to invite beauty in my life.
[00:23:44] What if I can just allow a little glimpses here and there? What if I can allow little glimpses here and there under the arm and start building those muscles. Start building those muscles. Those channels. Half of the head, my muscles are really weak around beauty. My muscle has been really weak around beauty and I still crave it and wish to
[00:24:12] want to develop that.
[00:24:20] Just notice how you feel when you think about that. Um, you’re welcome to share that. Like, I just want to sob, you know, I, I th I have a seven and a half year old here and, you know, when we point out beautiful things and he points out beautiful thing, that’s, there’s just such enthusiasm. Oh, wow. Wow. Just like now he’s an enthusiastic being and we continue to notice and share things that are beautiful.
[00:24:55] Um,
[00:25:00] I’m going to tap. Um, my mother used to take us out in the woods.
[00:25:07] Uh, the harvest for Koreans time is for terrain. So we would find all these things. So it would find all these things and pick them and take them, bag them, tag them.
[00:25:29] There wasn’t an appreciation. Wasn’t an appreciation. It was, it was just hunting and gathering. It was just hunting and gathering. And I’m struck right now, like the indigenous people that I know, the ones that are more connected to the land when they, when they harvest are they gathered, there is a sense of abundance and appreciation.
[00:25:54] If the closer they are to like their actual connection to the earth and the bounty and the appreciation like, oh, we have found these berries. We have found this mushroom that’s that we can, we can put in our meal tonight. There’s a, there’s a different sounds. And, uh, It changes things, you know, it really does.
[00:26:22] I believe that beauty is part of a thriving life and, and it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s weird for me to feel the, the really strong desire and need to do this workshop at a time when, um, no, just to be Frank right. Less than a third of the people that normally sign up for a workshop about something like Andre, um, have.
[00:26:53] Responded to something that I feel is really essential for thriving is to allow at least some doses of beauty to come into your, into your, your being and let them influence you. And I I’d like to talk about what it means to influence. Yeah. Can I just add something when you were talking about the acquiring the objects?
[00:27:15] I think that’s the survival brain thing. And I noticed that with my mom too, she sees something pretty. There’s not a momentary appreciation. Like, oh my God, look how beautiful this is. Let me let that soak into my cells. It’s I will get this and take it and put it in a dark closet somewhere. So it somehow belongs to me, but no one can ever find it again because it’s in this closet, that’s packed full of stuff.
[00:27:38] So I think that there’s a difference in how we experience beauty when we’re in survival brain. Like, let me grab all of it and put it in a bag and put it somewhere versus let me experience that. And I may. Bring some to enjoy in the moment, but I’m not hoarding it. I’m not taking it. If that makes sense.
[00:28:00] That makes so much sense. Um, you know, like I I’ve, um, I used to have like a really impulsive Amazon thing. Like if I saw it and it would be useful to me, I bought it. And it was during a period of time when, you know, I wasn’t being hurt or thrown off balance financially by doing that. But I would have boxes of stuff arrive and, and I wasn’t really into it.
[00:28:27] And one of the things I’ve noticed is that by saying, oh, isn’t that cool? That that exists, which is a way of letting the beauty of existence. Um, kind of influence us like, oh, isn’t that cool? Um, you know, Instagram, I’ve been doing that like, oh, wow. Look at what they’re creating for people. Um, and by if I let it in, in that way, it’s interesting to notice that I actually don’t have a desire to buy it unless it’s like really right.
[00:29:06] For me, it’s not a fear. It’s not a financial thing. It’s usually like, yeah, I’m really glad that toy is amazing and I’m not feeling, you know, and that’s all I needed from it was that little cool.
[00:29:26] And, um, yeah. So, um, Where was I going? Oh, influence.
[00:29:38] Um, part of,
[00:29:44] um,
[00:29:50] so I would say that influence if it’s, uh, if you’re up on a mountain and there’s a gorgeous sun. And you’re paying attention to the sunset, that the magnitude of the, of like the beauty of it and the like, is, is going to influence your body. Um, a lot of people have that experience, sunrises, sunsets, a shooting star.
[00:30:18] These are things that used to, I used to let influence me, um, the smaller things, what I’m calling these little doses of simple uploads, um, seem at least for my physiology, my myself to require a pause and the pause. Is not yet happening on its own. And so that’s why this is a real skills workshop. It means that, oh, there’s a skill to letting beauty influence us.
[00:30:57] And part of that is the pause. So let’s pause for a moment and see if there’s something in your, in your sphere of awareness. Maybe you can put your hands on it. Maybe you can’t, um, that you just notice and then sort of that, that has some beauty to it. It’s appealing to you, but then just let it go and notice like what your body does with that.
[00:31:33] Yeah. I mean, I like tell someone we’re seeing about how they cut it off. Can I try to share my hummingbird. For the people to just notice that, um, let me see if I can do this right. Are you seeing this? I’m sorry about the background noise. That’s my backyard. And I just love how delicate and pretty they are and see if you can just let in the fact that there’s roses and there’s a breeze and they’re just really enjoying that nectar.
[00:32:05] Like I can feel how much they’re letting they’re enjoying that. So, um, if you can, like, did you feel like you had to resist it? Did you have to, like you did, did you put a wall between you or pull yourself back or distract yourself? Or could you let yourself just notice there’s something pretty in front of you?
[00:32:26] Um,
[00:32:32] No, I don’t feel like it, it really reached as, as deeply. And maybe the hummingbirds, aren’t your thing. Like, we all find different things. Beautiful. I love watching them because they’re just so delicate. And, and someone said I got envious. There was a little bit of that too, which kind of took me out of, um, our, yeah.
[00:32:59] So if, if you’re wanting to just notice for yourself, what, how that impacted you or influenced you or not?
[00:33:14] Can we just do a guided tapping on like cutting ourselves off or pulling back from moody? Yeah. So take a gentle, slow breath.
[00:33:25] And I’d invite you. We’re talking to a lot about the survival brain and wanting to focus on the things that are, um, dangerous and that being a distraction. But I’d also like to say, to invite you to try on the concept that if you find something beautiful and you value it, you’re vulnerable in a certain way, there’s a certain, um, people can take it away or they can hurt you in some way.
[00:33:49] So if you don’t value anything, if you’re always in survival mode and you’re not saying, oh, that’s beautiful and lovely. Um, there’s a certain, um, protection we have up sometimes. And I had, uh, some brothers that would come if I valued something, they would often destroy it. They would, you know, just showing their power off.
[00:34:10] So if, just try not get into, I don’t know that this applies to everyone, but for me, there’s a certain, like if I don’t notice it. I won’t be in danger vulnerable wise, or it won’t be in danger. So we’re going to weave a little bit of both then karate chop, even though I kind of pull myself away from beauty, even though I kind of pull myself away from beauty, I feel like I cut myself off from it.
[00:34:37] I feel like I cut myself off from that. And I think some part of me is protecting me. And I think some part of me is protecting me and that’s okay. That’s okay. Part of me really wants to pull away from UT, pardon me really wants to pull away from beauty. What if I send things to that part of me for protecting me?
[00:35:03] What if I send thanks to that part of me for protecting me and I let it know that I don’t need to be protected from this so much anymore. And let it know. I don’t need to be protected from beauty quite so much anymore. Top of the head, there’s a lot of things stopping me from enjoying beauty. There’s so many things stopping me from enjoying beauty eyebrow.
[00:35:26] My survival brain is saying, no, no, no, my survival brain is saying no, no, no side of the I, my parents and teachers are saying focus on the danger, focus on the danger, focus on the task under the eye. And it feels vulnerable to see beauty. And it feels vulnerable to see beauty under the nose. It’s like the core me is exposed to the world.
[00:35:52] Like the core of me is exposed to the world. It’s really nourishing to see beauty, really nourishing to see beauty Colorbond. And part of me feels really afraid of that. Part of me feels really afraid. I’m in the arm. And maybe I can let a little bit in, maybe I can let a little bit in and notice that I’m safer than I thought I noticed that I’m nice gentle breath.
[00:36:23] And just notice what’s coming up around that for you.
[00:36:32] For me, I’m feeling how useful it was to hear that somebody else was feeling envious or jealous that, you know, their hummingbirds don’t behave the same way that yours do and body slam each other too. But I guess there’s so many of them in the area. I still have a tongue comb, so. I have nine feet or so now I feel slightly, she has a block upon her stomach, nine feeders and great joy.
[00:37:02] Like baby step was, you know, one feeder, right. Empty it, like in 12 hours. I’m like, okay, so I got another, I got another and another and another, and now she’s got a flock of hummingbirds that are better, like breakthrough community of thriving hummingbirds. Like there’s no scarcity here. Why are we fighting?
[00:37:23] Why wasted energy, the new ones that are like, Hey, chill. There’s so much California dreaming. Um, and it was really useful for me to, to recognize that, um, I think that’s why I was drawn to like something in our own world. Um,
[00:37:54] I, I like, I don’t that my boy found this lying on the ground and he was like, oh, why don’t I bring it inside and see if it blossoms? And that’s, you know, I don’t know if it will or not, but it’s
[00:38:16] alive. And as I just let myself feel and notice, I’m noticing more detail now already just by dropping in, there are these little tiny things below, probably what held the, the bud in place firmly. Now it’s allowing it to open more. Um, and that wasn’t very many seconds. And that’s, I, I don’t think there’s necessarily something magic about 17 seconds.
[00:38:55] Um, I heard that number from Abraham Hicks and I liked it because it’s not 10 seconds and it’s not 30 seconds. It sort of falls into this, um, weird zone of consciousness, like oh 17 seconds. And it’s more than, uh, a breath. It’s more than a couple, um, it’s dropping in and allowing it. And so if that thing that’s in your world, that you can notice if you want to put your hand on it.
[00:39:26] Um, or if it’s someplace just let’s take around 17 seconds and tune into it and see what your body does, if you allow it to actually influence you, imagine that the energy is coming in and changing your innards. Yeah. Okay.
[00:39:53] Yeah.
[00:40:19] If you notice some discomfort, I invite you to, um, recognize the difference. A lot of times when our brain feels discomfort, we decide it’s bad for us, or we should run. It’s too hard. It’s too hard, or it’s bad for us. We run away versus I’m getting used to this new thing and it’s a little uncomfortable. So we have discernment there’s we have to discern when we’re pushing ourselves too hard or something is like, today is not the day to do it.
[00:40:45] And I invite everyone to take care of themselves around that. But if you felt some discomfort around just being quiet or with something for that. And I noticed I did halfway through, I was like, it’s got, have been 17 seconds already. And I just took it. I was sort of counting softly in my head, but not trying to make it precise and because I’ve been practicing this, what I noticed was like there was tension and then my breath paused and then the out, you know, after the exhale, there was a pause and there was sort of like in the next inhale, there was more of the energy of it coming in.
[00:41:25] And then when the time was up, there was like an, ah, natural, like I was in a natural sort of rhythm there. And yeah, if honestly, If seven, if that felt long to you to let something beautiful influence your body, then your stress level inside is I’m guessing an 8, 9, 10. Just guessing that it’s somewhere up there because that wasn’t 20 minutes.
[00:41:59] That was, you know, this was not a seated meditation where we all stare at the Lotus flower and don’t do anything else for 20 minutes. That was you picking something. And we were there for a little while and I’ll tell you it’s a good measure for me. If I’m out on my walk and I noticed something and I get that little inkling, oh, that would be good to let that influence us.
[00:42:28] And I bounce off of it. It’s a signal to me. Oh, I’m really under nourished. I’m really under, I can’t even be present with something beautiful for 17 seconds. I am really under nourished about letting in something that refreshes us. I believe that a lot of our stresses are we’re undernourished around energy.
[00:42:58] We’re undernourished around connection and beauty. And, um, there’s that sense of like being at ease and flow? We’re really undernourished. Beauty is one of those that I believe that like our breath, some people never consciously breathe. Okay. And some people never consciously let beauty in. Okay. Both categories tend to strike my energy as being super stress driven.
[00:43:31] They’re running on stress chemicals. It’s a bit like the difference between, you know, a drag racer revving their engine, even when they’re not actually driving. I’ve been there, but when you’re talking about that, I’m noticing that when I’m really undernourished or I’ve been stressed and not noticing for awhile, sometimes noticing something that’s less perfect.
[00:43:57] Not something, sometimes it’s something that’s really beautiful. It’s hard to let in. It’s like, uh, the, the, the contrast is too much where versus rich sent me a picture of a leaf. It was all scarred up and fallen in water, I think. And it wasn’t like gorgeous, beautiful, but there was, the color was very attractive.
[00:44:16] And that for me was easier to let in than like this perfectly. That was like, you know, I just noticing that sometimes the smaller things, the less perfect things are easier for me to let in when I’m under nourished. So with that in mind, let’s see if we can go. And this is a different one. Um, Totally not perfect.
[00:44:40] I mean, to me as well, you know, to me, when I saw that it was again, like on my, on my return trip, the sun hit it. I I’d actually caught my attention from way far, further away than I could tell what it was, but there was an energy coming from it that said, notice me to me. Like that’s how it, and as I got closer, I could feel like, oh, fall, this is my, this is my season.
[00:45:12] This is my birthday month. Um, and I, I didn’t notice at first until I got really down to it, the speckles, you know, it’s not a perfectly colored leaf. You know, but it is like, I’ve, I’m I find it intriguing. Um, if you’re watching this and you can see it, just see if you can let in the beauty of that into yourself.
[00:45:42] And then one of the things I think that’s, we’ll talk more about this, but letting it kind of soak into yourselves, letting the beauty, not just visually hit your head, but like also nourish yourselves.
[00:45:57] You know, we’re sitting in front of computing devices. If it’s helpful to you, imagine that you’re on the trail and this is a leaf that has really stood out, like there for you to give you some nourishment.
[00:46:16] And if you’re having blocks, we’re gonna, we’ll have some time to tap with people. So notice what you’re feeling in your body or any thoughts that are coming up.
[00:46:40] So I think that one of the things that, um, just to get to the, to go a little bit deeper in the, allowing it into ourselves, I often a way to distance myself from beauty is to keep it very shallow. I’ll notice a beauty with like the front of my eyes, but I’m not letting that kind of fill my heart and notice like heavy universe provided this for me.
[00:47:03] Like there’s a zillion different possibilities in the world, but what is the possibility I’ll be there in that moment to see this leaf or this bird, or I, and I don’t let it sit, soak into myself and I kind of fulfilling lovely way. And when I can, I notice it, it’s a very warm feeling for me when I can just go, wow, look what the universe lined up.
[00:47:26] Uh, there were infinite possibilities for me to see something right this minute, but wow. This particular bee is on this particular piece of lavender. And I just happened to notice it and experienced this, this moment that will never happen again. There, it will never be exactly that be I’m not lavender.
[00:47:44] And, um, with me there and when I can let that in, it’s really delightful and fulfilling. And again, I think it’s a muscle that many of us don’t practice very often. So that like kind of allowing the, the joy and the delight into our bodies, into our cells where it can kind of nourish and fill us up. Um, uh, I love that Rick, you said, I noticed such things the, so my sense of smell, the forest comes alive and she gained, um, Jean said I could smell the leaf.
[00:48:18] Uh, the universe created the leaves and then she painted them. Yes. I love that. So, um, I think that there’s some resistance there for all of us often to really step into the full delight of what’s around us to you notice the uniqueness of, oh, I’m having this drink that I have all the time, but can I notice how it feels in my mouth right this minute?
[00:48:41] Can I notice the taste and the, the way my cells are wanting that, that particular drink? Or can I notice the warmth of the smile? Like I’m I love seeing the people I have videos on, and it’s fine if you don’t, it’s just, you’re taking care of yourself, but I love being able to look and see people and like there’s people I love here very much and people that I’m meeting relatively recently and I get to see these like-minded people here.
[00:49:09] And can I let that delight my eyes and delight? My eye is going to delight my heart and then radiate out to my whole body. I think there’s a way to walk through life with a lot more delight and bliss. Without being like, I think there’s a lot of spiritual bypassing that goes out in the world. And I, I have a lot of friends or the tantra community that are like, oh Sean D Shante nothing’s ever wrong.
[00:49:32] I, you know, like I’m never going to look at the bad stuff. And I’m like, that doesn’t seem that doesn’t resonate for me either definite dog poop on the trailer. Just perfect. I think there has to be a reality, a balance, a practicality. I admire people that can not notice then I, my brain as an engineer’s brain, as someone who is very aware of the ecosystem, energetically and, and physiologically, um, I.
[00:50:09] I want to make sure. Then one of the reasons that this is, this is a harder skill for me, um, because of how I was the, the talents of mine that were accentuated, which you touched on were like raw intelligence. And, and then when it wasn’t raw intelligence, it was. The quality of looking for an opportunity and taking it, the, find the Partridge Berry in under the leaves and heart and take it.
[00:50:38] Um, that’s not the only example, but as entrepreneurs, like looking for an opportunity and taking it, making it happen, um, and this is more yen nourishing. This is the kind of thing that in the culture, which is very exuberant young, you know, where we, we, we build, we grow, we fix, we solve problems. And, um, we’re also at least in the west from a, uh, a balance, a yin Yung kind of balance.
[00:51:17] We’re really undernourished. And that, that bit me, I didn’t, I didn’t have a clue when I was really sick. The idea of yang hadn’t even come to me. I didn’t even know that concept of never, you know, to reach 29 years of age and never understand about yin yang and balance and that symbol and what it means.
[00:51:42] And some of the ways of feeling that inside your own body, really a tragedy nearly killed me and yin depletion is something that happens when we’re in the cultural, as well as the media and the marketing and the political and all of that. It’s very young, it’s very cutting and decisive and got to do it and need to and should and everything else.
[00:52:12] I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with that. But certainly we can imagine that if we are of a blend of energies and we’re only exercising that one part of us that we’re going to get depleted malnourished. And so the real skill of noticing, you know, I just walked a quarter mile through one of the most biodiverse places on the planet.
[00:52:42] And I didn’t notice anything except for a pile of dog poop, probably. And to fish here, I might want to pause and kind of let myself shift to a place of receptivity. And this is part of it touching ourselves. It’s part of saying, I am not just to give her an exhale or a decisive cutter. I am someone who can allow not just the toxic byproducts of, uh, of that young culture, which, which is there to, to impact me as an empath, as a, as someone who is sensitive.
[00:53:31] But I can consciously turn to something, you know, like, like this it’s weighty, it was given to me by Kathy, you know, it sits on my desk. It normally faces away. Cause that’s pretty cool. Isn’t it? It’s like, Ooh, wonder what that’s hiding. And um, so there are times when like just holding it. I’m I’m now my jaw.
[00:54:03] Relaxing. Why? Because like, to be a creator, a co-creator we’re putting energy out to allow something in. Or maybe not 17 seconds, but I wish you guys could see, like, look at that. Look at what’s what’s in here that you just wouldn’t notice if you just always let it sit on the desk. And it grew over millions of years from faint gases in a cave somewhere, just having to grow at the right temperature and crystal immunity for our it leave for it to crystallize.
[00:54:41] And so, um, we’re going to take a seven minute break ish and the reason we’re going to do that is one so that we all get to move and be in our mammalian needs, as well as like, what is coming to you as part of this, you feel free to reflect that to the community in the chat. If you’d like, um, Kathy will be here.
[00:55:04] Are you going to be monitoring that too? Um, and if you’re watching the replay as well, You know, maybe it’s five years from now that you’ll see this and it’ll be touching you, um, taking a moment to reflect on, um, is this important to you? Like maybe, maybe that’s not really, you you’ve spent your time and it’s like, this isn’t important and maybe you’re like, whoa, wow.
[00:55:31] I didn’t realize how malnourished I was and how kind of I’m running on a particular kind of energy. And I could balance myself. I wonder what that would be like. Yeah. And I think that the seven minutes is E body take care of your body to restroom, drink, whatever, but you’re still in the container of the class, but we’re not talking and we’re not actively tapping.
[00:55:56] So it gives you a chance to explore you in a different way. So some journaling and some chatting, whatever. It’s a really beautiful time to capture what’s going on for you from your unique perspective. Okay. We’ll see you in a little bit.
[00:56:13] Are you going to go first? Or am I,
[00:56:21] yeah, so if you’re having things coming up and we already have one volunteer, we would probably have time for a little bit more. Another one at least. Um, if you have things coming up, resistances feelings, thoughts, you know, uh, yeah. Buts. I love the habits. Cause if we can clear them, it just makes it a lot easier.
[00:56:40] Um, feel free. If you’re wanting to tap with us, you can change your name to a, to a nickname. If you want. You do not have to have your video on, unless that feels good to you. Um, we’re glad to work with you and help you try to clear this out. Um, Doris. Yeah, but I don’t have time. That’s great in the chat. Um, so I’m going to go ahead and Wendy, I’m going to ask you.
[00:57:07] Okay. Yeah, I can hear you now. Great. And I just want to say, I love your, like, your, your dress matches the curtains and the very lovely we’re talking about beauty. I’m like what a lovely background and matches your outfit. I like to create beauty and that’s kind of what, one of the things that came up for me is that when I see beauty, I feel like I have to do something about it.
[00:57:38] And so at one point we were tapping. I was like, I actually felt terrified of really allowing the beauty in. And another thought that came up was that art for is like the, be all end all for my mother. I grew up. With a lot of art in my house, I used to create visual art. I used to play several instruments.
[00:58:12] I got perfectionism, just like, you know, ruined everything for me for most of my life. And so it’s like, you know, I have this beautiful rose out in front of my house, but it’s like, when I go to really enjoy my garden, I feel like, oh, I got a D you know, I got a mulching, I got up printed. I got all this work and I just don’t want to do it.
[00:58:46] And, and like, I, I can’t overcome that feeling of like, if I’m appreciating art, I should also be creating. Okay. Can you just take a nice deep breath?
[00:59:02] I’m really delighted that you brought this forward because I think this is something a lot of people struggle with this. So just again, just take a nice deep breath if you can. And what’s an early memory you have of you wanting just to appreciate something or enjoy it. And was it your mother or somebody else telling you that you just had to get?
[00:59:23] This is actually kind of funny one that was really about art, but I was probably like five years old and I was dancing to the music on the radio. And then my mother wanted me to dance for her friends who were over for drinks or something. I was like, and that like, you know, maybe shut down like that. My enjoyment.
[00:59:53] Became a performance. Can we just tap? Can you imagine you’re going to tap on yourself, but imagine you’re also tapping on that little five-year-old if that feels okay. Karate chop. Hey sweetheart. Hey sweetheart. You knew how to find delight in things. You knew how to define delight and it became a performance instead, and it became a performance.
[01:00:18] I am so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that mom couldn’t see the delight we were having. I’m sorry. And just let it be that and just let it be that she must’ve felt pretty uncomfortable with good things or really uncomfortable was good. And she used the argument that it wasn’t perfect so I can enjoy it.
[01:00:45] She used the argument that it wasn’t perfect. It’s okay, sweetheart. You did a great job. You did a great job and you don’t have to believe her story anymore. And I don’t have to believe her story anymore. Top of the head, it was really important back then to believe that story it’s really important to believe that story back then, I really had to bond with mom, um, mom side of the eyes.
[01:01:17] So anytime something was nice. So anytime something was nice under the eye, we’d focus on how it could be better. We focused on how it could be better under the nose, and then we could really not notice how good things were. And then I can really notice not good things. Good things. I better mulch that.
[01:01:40] Better malt that collarbone. I better practice that. A better practice that under the arm, I better perform there, but the form they’re top of the head, that’s not quite good enough, not quite good enough. I about when I internalize those messages, I internalized those messages side of the eye and it leaves me feeling really sad and a little bit angry was feeling really sad and a little bit angry, maybe more than a little bit under the eye.
[01:02:10] I want to reclaim my joy. I want to reclaim my joy. I want to reclaim my delight in those roses that are not mold stir pruned. I want to reclaim my delight in those, those roses that are not mulched your print tin. They’re gorgeous right now. They’re gorgeous right now. How about, what if things can be beautiful right in the moment.
[01:02:35] What if things will be beautiful right? In the moment under the arm, there are times I wanted two things in. There are times I want to change things top of the head. I’m not sorry that I learned that. Not sorry that I learned that I brought, but that’s, I don’t want that to be all. I notice I want that to be all I know.
[01:02:56] So to the eye, maybe I can turn that down to 10%. Maybe I can turn that down to 10 under the eye and notice beautiful things. 90% of the time and notice beautiful things. 90% of the time under the nose, that without a lot more delighted my life, add a lot more delight. 10 I’m good at creating beauty and good or creating beauty collarbone.
[01:03:22] I’m good at noticing beauty and good at noticing under there. And now I just like to tune in and enjoy the beauty all around me. I’d like to just tune in and enjoy the beauty covered that. I think it’s safer to do that than I thought. I think it might be safer to do that than I thought. Take a nice deep breath.
[01:03:48] What do you notice it? No, it’s not safe now noticing. Okay. And where do you feel that not safety in your body? Right. And my upper chest, like anxiety. Yeah. It’s just the tightness and a real tightness in my diaphragm. And also. You know, like, uh, wanting to cry and the, and the, the word wonder just keeps coming up.
[01:04:21] Like, like how come I can’t have a sense of wonder anymore. Try to chop, even though this doesn’t feel safe, even though it’s really doesn’t feel sorry. I have all this tension in my body, like all this tension in my body. And I’m a little bit afraid of this feeling, this feeling I’m not used to noticing wonder all around me who noticing wonder, and I miss it so much, so much.
[01:04:54] What if I can just take it in little doses? Just take it and little dose, top of the head. Would it be safe to have a small cup of water? Would it be safe to have a small cup of, I ride don’t need to bathe in it yet. Don’t need to be side of the eye. It’s been a long time since I had any, any of this nutrient.
[01:05:17] It’s been a long time since I’ve had any of this nutrient under the, I learned to shut down my longing for wonder, I learned to shut down my longing for wonder under the nose. No wonder. I’m so very sad, very sad. And I may have to grieve. As I know, as I enjoy this wonder, I may have to grieve as I enjoy this wonder holler vote, but that will leave lots more space for the wonder, but that’ll leave lots more space for the wonder under the arm.
[01:05:47] This grief is genuine is grief is genuine cup of the head. I was deprived of my wonder. It was deprived of my wonder. Now I’m allowing it back a little at a time and now I’m allowing it back a little bit at the time. Take a nice deep breath.
[01:06:15] So part of me was like, you can’t handle a couple of ones. If you could get a cup of wonder, you’re going to have to dive into the ocean of it. And then, and then where will you? In wonder
[01:06:32] the intro, the early messages, not from parents, like we, we absorbed them. We don’t have the world experience to say that’s a stupid rule and I’ll just pretend for now. It’s really internalize it. So if you can, like it does, he doesn’t even have to be a whole cup of wonder. Maybe it’s a teaspoonful at first, like maybe you can notice, oh, I’m really judging the roses for not being mulched and pretend I didn’t do enough, but wow.
[01:06:57] For 10 seconds or five seconds. Can I just notice the pedals are so lovely and the scent is divine and even if I don’t Malter prune them, there’s still a rose. How does that feel? Suffering up the effect? It was good. I still, um,
[01:07:19] there’s some kind of. Weird friction was perfectionism still, but I feel like, you know, I’m in a better position to work on this. Cause I feel like I’ve gotten over most of my perfectionism in, you know, all the years I’ve been tapping now, but I still can’t make that leap into being more creative again in ways that, you know, I used to be and really want to do again.
[01:07:55] But there’s, there’s like a barrier. If I’m not perfect, then what
[01:08:07] then why bother to what’s the point? And, okay. And how would you like to perceive that? To be good enough to enjoy it. Have you tried doing things badly? Intentionally? I’m just curious if that’s, when something, um, well, I used to try to surf in like my mid forties, I took up surfing, which I realized is kind of that taken to a whole new level because most of you know, you, you let most of the waves go by.
[01:08:51] So, uh, but that’s no, I’ve never really practiced. Intentionally.
[01:09:03] So I think that that moderating around perfectionism is, is like a lifelong kind of fear-based what you could, what you could look like is, is actually if you’re with the roses and you feel like, oh, they’re not perfect because they’re not mulched and pruned actually touch them, hold them, be with them and, and let yourself feel, just tap and feel with the roses, the judgment that you’re heaping on them for not for not being perfect, not being crafted.
[01:09:41] And, um, it can be helpful to go to places where nature is nature and not crafted by human hands, to the extent, um, where you see. If you remember, were you here for the little mushroom that I, I showed? So there’s, to me a perfection in that crafting, but it wasn’t laid out by any human, like deciding that the stick, it was not, it’s not a Zen mushroom.
[01:10:15] It is a living mushroom that happens to be in the middle of a trail, not the perfect place for it. Um, and it’s beautiful. And it, I think that that’s where for me, for example, getting away from the big, beautiful, crafted, and focusing in on the things that are a little more wild and free, including, you know, kids that are being more wild and free, um, myself, when I’m feeling a little more wild and free.
[01:10:53] And, and, and getting clear on the fear, the why bother you could tap. Oh, why bother if it’s not going to be perfect? Oh, my, my garden. Isn’t perfect. And I, I bothered and it, I like it, but why, you know, add some like noise to what, what your perfectionism is sitting on top of usually our perfectionism is sitting on top of some noisy beliefs.
[01:11:20] Like why bother or if I don’t try to bake it. Perfect. It won’t be good enough. That’s that’s compost at this point in our lives. If, if it’s compost, let it be compost and see what we want to grow from that, you know, I, I believe. David had this vision of you going out and finding a rose where like, there, like it didn’t open even layer.
[01:11:46] It has some pedals dropping off and very intentionally cutting that one and Rina in and leaving it where you could see it rather than, than getting the most perfect one. Just noticing that, even if it’s perfect, there’s like, it’s so delicate and it still smells even though it’s not symmetrical and everything.
[01:12:01] I think that there’s different ways you can attack that perfectionism so that we can just be in perfectly beautiful. I had a similar thought, Kathy, because, um, I often like when, if I come home and it’s right off in front of my house, so I’ll often like take a photo of when it’s perfect when there’s a perfect bloom and like, you know, texted to a friend or something.
[01:12:27] I was like, oh, maybe I should start taking pictures of the imperfect ones. Yeah. Yeah. And you can even share that in the center because I think that would not only help you, but others, because I think we do, I don’t look like Cindy Crawford or Crawford or some model, therefore I’m not good enough. I’m not smart as smart as Einstein.
[01:12:46] So I’m not good enough. I’m not, we compare us to us, always to the perfection in a given area. And then we feel inadequate. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. It’s great. I would like to do a tapping on like what we consider beautiful and, um, perhaps allowing us to expand our, our awareness. Um, even though there are so many rules about what’s beautiful.
[01:13:18] Even though there’s so many rules about what’s beautiful and what is not, and what is not what doesn’t make the grade that doesn’t make the grade there. My brain has picked up on that and my brain is picked up on that. I’m filtering out a lot of stuff. I’m filtering out a lot of stuff. What if a lot of that stuff is beautiful in its own way?
[01:13:45] What if a lot of that stuff is beautiful in its own way,
[01:13:51] filter out a lot.
[01:13:55] Eyebrow. I filter out a lot. I filter on a lot by the, I I’m guessing some of it would catch my attention. I’m guessing some of it would catch my attention. Maybe I bet some of it would nourish me. Some of it wouldn’t nourish me even in surprising ways, even in the surprising ways, something nourished me in a surprising way, in a surprising way.
[01:14:32] What if something really nourished me in a surprising way? What if something really nourished me in a surprising way?
[01:14:42] That would be beautiful. I was walking along one morning and, um, there was a log and it was. Long time, dead, dead, dead. Like hadn’t seen life for a while. It was hollowed out. It was crumbling and there was something about it because there was so much life around it. And even things like Turkey, tail and mushrooms growing out of it and Moss and.
[01:15:22] There was something in there that it nourished me. It’s like, you know, when I’m dead and gone, Mohs might grow on some idea. Some fungus might grow like there, there could be a transformation of this workshop might end up being something that Moss grows on some day in a way that nourishes an ecosystem. I believe the emotional world is designed to be more natural than artificial.
[01:15:57] I believe that there’s ideas that grow and all of the different ways that we are interconnected, um, is important in and of itself. And so, but there’s no part of me that if I looked at it like, well, is that beautiful? I, I didn’t take a picture of, uh, but in that moment it caught my eye. The part of me that is looking for nourishment, the same primal part of me that would notice a Berry that would give me fuel that would notice things that I could make use of my hunter gatherer is also alive.
[01:16:38] If I let it at noticing things that can, can teach me about what it means to be a living creature in this world can teach me that we can be of value. Even if our ideas don’t spread like with a million likes and 10,000 views that sharing something, um, the chosen backdrop of your zoom image that you put on.
[01:17:12] And touch someone can be just something that they notice. They let it influence them for a moment and their life is changed their ecosystem, their emotional world. I, I, I so appreciate those of you that have helped make this possible for us to explore this as a group, I feel enriched by our, our time together and our connection in this, um, thriving now.center, where we have the replay, um, is a place where you are welcomed to also walk and notice and just pick and choose if something catches your eye and feel whether there’s something that can nourish you.
[01:17:57] Um, and that might be beautiful. I think there’s a certain irony that we’re here because we’re not perfect at enjoying UT. And yet the courage everyone brought and the questions and the, the curiosity to me is really beautiful. The transformation, the even a small step forward is, is very fulfilling and, and inspiring for me.
[01:18:19] So I just want to, if you can notice the beauty in you, even as you’re struggling, there’s a beauty, it’s like a, a tendril of, of a new shoot growing up through rocks and, and old stuff. And like you’re creating beauty despite being here in questioning and it doesn’t have to be perfect and it doesn’t have to be elegant, but it can still be inspiring and lovely.
[01:18:43] And I just really appreciate this, this kind of topic where we’re getting to the various. Quiet noticing it’s most people that’s hard. We’re not putting on superhero capes and flying through the air, like sobbing hysterically as we’re breaking things down, but this kind of thing, it is nourishing and it can keep us fulfilled in the quiet moments.
[01:19:03] And in even in the depths of despair, it’s like, oh, there’s a flower there. There’s a beautiful leaf there. And I think this kind of skill is something that makes us incredibly resilient. So I’m really glad you suggested it. Reddick. Thank you for bringing this forward.
[01:19:23] Thank you. We’re all simple. Uplifts is another thing. If you go out to thriving now.center and just search for simple uplifts, um, it’s where we’re another concept around this, um, to nourish us nourish our, our in our soul, our sense of being a part of, oh, a world where there’s beauty and then thank you all.
[01:19:50] Thank you, bye. For now.

We covered…

  • How normal it is to be focused on everything BUT beauty when we’re stressed or feel unsafe.
  • That when we are in primitive brain, our system doesn’t see, hear, taste, or smell the same way as when we’re calm and letting beauty influence us.
  • Exercises to help bring simple, accessible beauty into our cells.
  • 17 seconds of beauty nourishment
  • Lots of EFT Tapping on the blocks to allowing beauty to influence us

Resources Mentioned

  1. EFT Tapping Guide

  2. The Polyvagal Theory: The New Science of Safety and Trauma

  3. Thriving Now Emotional Freedom Circle

Great to have you on this journey with us!


Great session! Just watched the replay. 17 seconds…such a helpful skill to practice, noticing beauty. This is what I looked at during that time.

Thank you for this session.