I'm Tired

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As a parent in this phase, PEACE is the core. And often hard to have.

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Peace please, thank you.

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I think my grandson, Micah needs the kind of rest that requires peace. We were upstairs, having said hello to Sasha, when he said, “Nonna, you’re so lucky to live here alone because you have peace and quiet.” That statement kind of left me speechless and yet I think/hope he “gets” the kind of energy I offer to anyone who enters my home. :heart::peace_symbol::yin_yang::heart:

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How old is Micah Norene? It sounds like he does “get it” and wants more. It’s so sweet that he can come to you and feel that peace and quiet. :heart:

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I currently feel the deep longing for both rest and peace…in my personal experience they can be interrelated. Some consistent quality sleep would be welcome…and it might just appear if I had some more inner-peace and calm.

As we have discussed before this feels to me more like a ‘situation’ or a ‘predicament’ that needs to be tended or managed rather than a problem that has a solution.

IT’S COMPLICATED!!! :crazy_face:

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Micah is 9 years old. I am so grateful that I can offer him some respite from the chaos that is his day to day norm. Summer vacation starts soon and I hope to spend some one on one time with each of the boys.

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Yes, it IS complicated! It sounds to be me like your sleep, inner-peace and calm are at odds with each other…as if all three are on the hamster wheel in a race to no where! How might you SIMPLIFY the COMPLICATED?

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That is THE question I think… for me at this particular time a degree of acceptance of some things would be helpful. I worry over things that have already occured and things that haven’t happened…and that ain’t good!! :crazy_face:

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So, maybe the question becomes what is stopping you from accepting the things that have already or not happened, instead of continuing to worry about them? It seems apparent that worry does not effect the outcome. :woman_shrugging:

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It’s true that worry does not affect the outcome of the things I’m worried about…but worry does have an outcome unto itself…and that’s the bit that’s problematic of course. So, how do I walk away from worry?..how do I turn my back on worry?..how do I smile and say ‘no thank you’ to worry?..how do I love and accept the part of me that feels that worrying is worthwhile and useful and appropriate and at the same time not hand over authority to that part of me?? I think what I do is communicate with that part of me, learn and acknowledge what it’s positive intentions are for me and then find other behaviours that meet those same intentions.

This has been a great excercise for me to run through…thanks Norene!! It’s allowed me to connect with my NLP way of considering things…specifically what the intention is behind the behaviour…then finding other more desireable behaviours (more than one is important!) to meet that same intention.

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Yes! And for me I needed to decide what state of being I would find more “me” – the embodied those intentions and helped them come to fruition.

You might guess that Calm and Confident was my choice and my practice.

Worry is my default. Calm and Confident is my choice.

“Even though it would be so normal to worry here about this and that and especially THAT, I’ve decided to be absurdly calm and confident.”

Perhaps that decision activates a bit of my “cultural evolution” side, that culture is always changing, but often changing because of manipulation by currently-in-power authoritarians and certaintists. Being calm and confident allows me to explore rather than hide, flee, or fight… or freeze.

Inside me, worry – even though it seems like there is something happening, a cycle of worry – is a freeze response.

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Oh man…thanks for all that Rick…that really fine tunes it for me.

This statement is worth the price of admission!! The ‘state of being that emobdies those intentions’…calm/confident is the golden pathway that leads to the intentions… a choice to enact and enable…a pathway to offer ‘the part of me that worries’…an offer…an invitation rather than an insistance or a demand to behave differently…an invitation to walk a different path that has far more likelihood of arriving at the ‘intention destination’ because ‘calm/confident’ has movement and direction…and it’s very difficult to move toward that destination when in a state of ‘worry/freeze’, a state that doesn’t want to move. How can I move toward my intention from a state that resists movement?

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I’m not sure how it works for you, but worry “feels” like movement, and there’s energy there. So I could direct that into tapping with some out loud ooomph.

“Even though I just love being so worried about this (a little ridiculousness), I’ve decided to be ridiculously calm and confident right here, right now.”

What happens when you try something like that?

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I was feeling into your observation…

…when I wrote “How can I move toward my intention from a state that resists movement?” Seeing worry as an expression of ‘freeze’ (a resistance to movement) made sense to me experientially. Yes, worry definitely has energy for me…but it’s a sort of movement that only turns in on itself …like a whirlpool maybe…there is movement within a whirlpool ( of worry) but it does not go anywhere…it certainly does not travel toward it’s intention…it remains in the same location in the stream and does not move with the current. Seeing worry as an expression of ‘freeze’ was very useful to me.

I really like your ‘oomph’ suggestion and the statement you offered…it feels quite potent in it’s acknowledgement of the powerful seduction of worrying (that energy!!..sucked into the whirlpool!!..it’s kind of invigorating in a strange way…it’s better than feeling nothing!) I’m going to tap on that over the next few days and report back…Field Notes From The Whirlpool!!!

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