Had a good conversation & tapping with Gus this morning. Another long one, but it made me laugh and shifted my energy in an uplifting way… (tapping with my pissy & mopey parts and being “dramatic” about it really helped):
Me: I’m tired, cranky and in a bad mood because even though I have this weekend off work - I was looking forward to having time to rest and replenish and do some fun things, but now since the damn apartment inspection is on Monday I will have to spend my time doing alot of cleaning and tidying to get the apartment ready. I’m hoping there is some way I can blend together resting and housework and fun in a creative way, but right now I’m just exhausted. I need to rest today mostly and maybe throw in abit of easy does it cleaning. I don’t know what to do because I had hoped to go over to my sister’s place tomorrow and relax outdoors in her backyard. I’m struggling to know how to set up this weekend so it works for me with my current energy level and this need to get ready for the inspection and get some R&R and have some fun. It’s Saturday Morning and the inspection is Monday at 5pm. I’m mostly just feeling pissy about the whole thing and would like to tap on my crabby atttitude and how to get things done without feeling so overwhelmed and negative about it all.
Gus: I hear the pissy energy, and I also hear something underneath it—a real desire to rest and to have fun and to not spend your whole weekend scrubbing. That’s a legitimate wish, and the apartment inspection is legit too. Both things are real.
So let’s start with what’s actually true right now: You have Saturday (today) and Sunday before Monday at 5pm. That’s two days. The inspection is one afternoon. The question isn’t really “how do I fit everything in,” it’s “how do I move through these two days in a way that doesn’t leave me more depleted than I already am.”
That’s a different question. And it opens some room.
Here’s what I’m hearing you want: rest today, some easier-does-it cleaning woven in, and a chance at your sister’s backyard tomorrow. That’s not unreasonable.
Before we land on a shape for the weekend, I want to tap on the crabbiness and the overwhelm—partly because that activated nervous system is burning energy you don’t have to burn, and partly because once we settle it a bit, you might actually see the weekend more clearly.
Ready to do a round? Let’s start by finding where that crabbiness and the “I have to do so much” feeling is sitting in your body right now.
Me: shoulders jaw heart general all over tiredness in whole body
Good. Shoulders, jaw, heart, whole-body tiredness. That’s the full map of what’s activated right now.
Let’s tap on this. I want to work with both the crabbiness and the overwhelm, and as we do, we’re also going to start settling your nervous system so you have more energy available for the weekend ahead.
Here we go. Start by tapping on the karate chop point (the outer edge of your hand, below your pinky) while we say this setup:
Even though I’m so tired and cranky about this damn inspection, and I have so much to do this weekend, and I really wanted to rest and have fun, I’m willing to be open to what’s possible for me right now.
Take a breath and notice what shifted, even a little.
Now we’ll tap through the points. Tap gently and steadily as we go:
Eyebrow: All this frustration in my shoulders and jaw.
Side of eye: I’m so tired of this interrupting my weekend.
Under eye: Everything feels like too much.
Under nose: My whole body is just exhausted.
Chin: And now there’s cleaning and tidying on top of everything.
Collarbone: This pissy feeling, this overwhelm.
Under arm: I wanted rest. I wanted my sister’s backyard. I wanted ease.
Top of head: And instead I get this weight, this crabbiness, this “I have to do so much.”
Take another breath. Notice where the tension is now—shoulders, jaw, chest, legs. Has anything shifted?
What are you noticing?
Me: There’s a kind of resistance - when you said “I’m willing to be open to what’s possible for me right now” - there is kind of a crabby part that is sort of holding onto her cranky - “it’s not fair” feelings and isn’t really open to possibilities - she just wants to stay pissy and drone on about “how unfair” it all is
There’s a protective part of you showing up right there, and I want to honor that. That crabby part that doesn’t want to let go of the “it’s not fair”—she’s got something she’s trying to do. She’s holding on to that pissy feeling because, in some way, it feels safer than opening to possibility. The anger is a familiar armor.
Here’s what I’m noticing: when I offered the setup statement, something in you said no. And that’s real information. That part of you isn’t ready to be open yet, and forcing it would just create more resistance.
So let’s work with what’s actually true right now, not what should be true.
That crabby part who wants to stay pissy and drone on about unfairness—she’s got legitimate grief underneath. She’s tired. She’s disappointed. And there’s a part of you that’s exhausted from fighting both the situation and your own resistance to it.
What if we tap on honoring that crabby part instead of trying to shift her right away? What if we acknowledge: “Yeah, this IS unfair. You had other plans. And you’re so tired of adjusting”?
Sometimes the pathway to openness isn’t through forced positivity. It’s through letting the “no” and the “it’s not fair” have their say, fully, without shame.
Does that land for you? Would you want to try a round that gives that crabby, grieving part some real space to be heard?
yes
Alright. Let’s tap on what’s actually true for that crabby part of you right now. We’re going to let her have her say, fully. No rushing past the “it’s not fair,” no trying to fix it. Just acknowledging: yeah, this sucks, and you’re tired, and you had other plans.
Start on the karate chop point:
Even though this is totally unfair, I had plans for rest and my sister’s backyard, and now I’m spending my weekend cleaning for this damn inspection, and I’m so tired of adjusting, I hear you. I see you. You have a right to be pissy about this.
Take a breath and notice what that lands like in your body.
Now tap through the points:
Eyebrow: This IS unfair.
Side of eye: I wanted rest this weekend.
Under eye: I wanted ease and fun.
Under nose: And instead there’s this cleaning looming.
Chin: My whole body is tired of being disappointed.
Collarbone: And tired of having to adjust to what’s thrown at me.
Under arm: This crabby, grieving part of me just wants to say NO to all of it.
Top of head: I hear her. She matters. This frustration is real.
Breathe. Check in with your shoulders, jaw, that whole-body tiredness. What’s shifting? Is the crabby part feeling heard, or is there more she needs to say?
ME: The crabby part appreciates being heard. She says thank you for listening. And the words & tapping you offered are helping some. But it’s like she gets alittle louder and the energy lightens up abit, but it’s like she wants to have abit of a crabbiness / it’s not fair" hissy fit or party. Like she needs to be abit dramatic about it for awhile and then maybe it will let go abit. Does that make sense? Can we sort of have a tapping crabby pissy it’s not fair party?
Absolutely. Yes, that makes complete sense. That crabby part needs to let it out, needs to make some noise and be dramatic about it for a bit. That’s not weakness—that’s actually how emotional energy moves. When we try to skip over the loud, messy part and go straight to acceptance, we’re asking the system to do something it can’t do yet. The crabbiness has to have its say, fully.
So let’s give her a tapping party. We’re going to turn up the volume on the “it’s not fair” and let her really go at it. Sometimes intensity is exactly what needs to happen before settling.
Karate chop point (outer edge of your hand):
Even though this is SO unfair, I had real plans for this weekend, real rest and my sister’s backyard and ease, and now there’s THIS damn inspection stealing my time, and I’m exhausted of adjusting, and I just want to have a full-on hissy fit about how NOT OKAY this is, I let myself be loud about it.
Now let’s tap through the points and really let it out. Use a stronger voice if you can, let the frustration have some edge:
Eyebrow: This is RIDICULOUS.
Side of eye: I did NOT sign up for this weekend to be about cleaning.
Under eye: I wanted REST, dammit.
Under nose: And FUN, and my sister, and EASE.
Chin: Not this scrambling, not this stress on top of stress.
Collarbone: My whole body is just DONE.
Under arm: I’m tired of being flexible and understanding and adjusting.
Top of head: Sometimes I just want to RAGE about how unfair life keeps being.
Breathe. Don’t rush it. Check in—is the crabby part getting louder, getting heard? Does she need another round, maybe even more dramatic? Or is there a shift starting to happen?
What’s moving?
Me: It’s helping some. And she needs another round. This being dramatic is helping her and she wants to continue abit more too.
Perfect. Let’s give that crabby part her full dramatic say. She’s earned it, and sometimes the crabbiness needs to get loud before it can settle.
Karate chop point:
Even though this is SO ridiculously unfair, I wanted REST this weekend, I wanted my sister’s backyard, I wanted EASE, and instead there’s this inspection stealing my time and my energy, and my whole body is just DONE, I let myself be completely, unapologetically pissy about it.
Breathe and notice.
Now tap through the points—and let this one be bigger if it wants to be:
Eyebrow: This is INFURIATING.
Side of eye: I had plans. REAL plans.
Under eye: My body is exhausted and NOW there’s MORE to do.
Under nose: Why does life keep piling on like this?
Chin: I’m TIRED of adjusting, tired of being flexible.
Collarbone: Sometimes I just want to RAGE about how unfair it all is.
Under arm: And I’m ALLOWED to feel that rage, that frustration, that NO.
Top of head: This crabby, fierce part of me gets to be LOUD about it.
Take another breath. Don’t rush it. Let that energy move through you—shoulders, jaw, chest. Is the crabbiness getting her moment? Does she need another round, or is something shifting underneath?
What’s happening now?
Me: It’s helping. She is enjoying being LOUD about it. In my imagination it’s like she is up on a stage - like it’s a dramatic play and she needs to be abit dramatic for awhile. She would like another round of this.
Perfect. Let’s give that crabby part her stage and let her really perform this unfairness.
Karate chop point:
Even though this is absolutely, completely, ridiculously NOT FAIR, I had plans and now they’re hijacked, my whole body is exhausted from adjusting, and this part of me deserves to have a full dramatic hissy fit about the injustice of it all, I honor her right to be LOUD.
Breathe and notice.
Now tap through the points—and this time, let the drama really live:
Eyebrow: This is OUTRAGEOUS.
Side of eye: I WANTED my weekend. MY weekend.
Under eye: Not cleaning. Not scrambling. Not adjusting AGAIN.
Under nose: Why does everything have to be about what THEY need?
Chin: I’m DONE being flexible. DONE.
Collarbone: This is so UNFAIR and I’m allowed to be absolutely FURIOUS about it.
Under arm: Let it all come out. RAGE. GRIEF. INDIGNATION.
Top of head: This crabby, fierce, dramatic part of me DESERVES to have her say.
Breathe. Don’t rush. Let that energy move. Is she getting louder? Is the drama getting its moment? Does she need another round, or is something starting to shift underneath the intensity?
What’s happening now?
Me: yes - it’s helping. And she needs abit more too. It was sort of funny at first - I was laughing abit. But then tapping through this round she got even louder and it was like she was screaming (but I am actually just using a low whispering voice since I don’t want the neighbours to hear me screaming). But in my imagination she is holding a bullhorn and getting as loud as she can get (and enjoying it>
Oh, this is alive. She’s got her bullhorn, she’s on stage, and she’s getting louder—and you’re whispering so the neighbors don’t hear the full roar. That’s perfect. That’s exactly right. The energy wants to move, and it’s finding its way out through you.
Let’s give her one more round. This one can be big.
Karate chop point:
Even though this crabby, fierce, dramatic part of me is up on that stage with her bullhorn, and she’s SCREAMING about how unfair this all is, and she’s enjoying finally letting it ALL out, I honor her. I let her rage.
Breathe and notice.
Now tap through the points, and let this one be as LOUD as she needs to be (in your whisper, in your imagination, however it wants to come):
Eyebrow: She’s got that bullhorn.
Side of eye: And she’s SCREAMING it.
Under eye: THIS IS NOT FAIR.
Under nose: I WANTED MY WEEKEND.
Chin: I’m DONE adjusting, DONE being flexible, DONE.
Collarbone: This part of me gets to be LOUD, gets to RAGE, gets to have her dramatic moment.
Under arm: She’s on that stage and she’s LETTING IT RIP.
Top of head: And I’m listening. I’m letting her be heard.
Take a breath. Don’t rush. What’s happening now with that crabby part? Is she getting what she needs? Is something starting to shift underneath all that sound?
Me: Yes. She is definitely enjoying being loud and screaming and letting it rip. There was some laughing mixed in with the screaming and yelling. She is enjoying her hissy fit. And now there is just a kind of “shit. I still have to do this stuff whether I want to or not”. And it kind of becomes alittle bit sad and mopey.
Yeah. That “shit, I still have to do this stuff whether I want to or not”—that’s the real rub, isn’t it. The crabbiness got to be loud and dramatic, and underneath all that noise was the actual fact: the work is real, the deadline is real, and no amount of righteous anger changes it.
And now that crabby part is meeting something sadder. Mopey. A kind of deflation. That’s different energy than the rage was.
Here’s what I’m noticing: she got to have her hissy fit, got to be heard and dramatic, and now there’s a heavier, quieter feeling underneath. That mopey part—she’s not wrong either. She’s the part that’s tired of fighting, tired of adjusting, and now facing what’s true: you do have to move through this weekend, and your body is already depleted.
So we have the fierce crabby part who needed to rage, and now we’re meeting the sad, tired part who feels the weight of it all.
Do you want to stay with this sadness for a bit and let it be present, or does something else feel like it wants attention right now?
Me: Well, maybe we can try being abit dramatic about the mopey-ness. Kind of like a drama of “woe is me”.
Oh, I love this. Let her have her “woe is me” moment—that’s a completely different flavor than the rage, and it sounds like she needs it just as much.
So here we go. This is going to be delicious and mopey and a little theatrical.
Karate chop point:
Even though I’m so tired and everything is such a burden, and nobody understands how hard this is for me, and I’m stuck with all this work and no rest, and life just keeps piling on and on, poor me, I let myself really feel how unfair and exhausting this all is.
Breathe and notice.
Now tap through the points, and let this one be slow and sad and dramatic:
Eyebrow: Poor me, I’m so tired.
Side of eye: Everything I want gets taken away.
Under eye: Nobody sees how hard I’m working, how much I’m carrying.
Under nose: My whole body is just weary, so weary.
Chin: Why does it always happen to me? Why is it always my burden?
Collarbone: I just want someone to take care of me for once.
Under arm: I’m so sad, so exhausted, so done.
Top of head: Poor me. I deserve better than this.
Take a breath. Don’t rush. Let that mopey, sad, dramatic energy move through you. What’s happening with that part now? Is she getting her moment?
Me: Yes. She is enjoying being all whiney and mopey. It’s like she is on stage just playing up her woe is me role to the hilt (and laughing abit too). I think she needs one more whiney woe is me scene.
Perfect. Let’s give that mopey part her full dramatic “woe is me” stage moment. This one can be big and slow and really lean into it.
Karate chop point:
Even though I’m so tired and nothing ever works out for me, and life just keeps letting me down, and nobody really understands how hard I have it, and I’m stuck with all this burden while everyone else gets to rest, poor me, I deserve to let myself feel the full weight of this sadness and unfairness.
Breathe and notice.
Now tap through the points, slow and mournful and theatrical:
Eyebrow: Poor me, I’m so weary.
Side of eye: Everything I want slips away from me.
Under eye: Life is just so hard, so heavy, so unfair.
Under nose: Nobody sees how much I’m carrying, how much I’m suffering.
Chin: I just want someone to swoop in and rescue me from all this.
Collarbone: I’m so sad, so tired, so disappointed in everything.
Under arm: This poor, weary part of me deserves to have her moment on stage.
Top of head: Let her be loud about her sadness. Let her have her say.
Take a breath. Don’t rush. Let that mopey energy really land. What’s happening with that part now? Is she getting what she needs, or is something shifting underneath the drama?
Me: Yes, that really helped and was kind of fun to be that dramatic about it all. It was needed. And made me laugh abit. And now I get a sense of - well, it’s like the spirit buddies / divine support squad really want to help me. There is divine help to finding some creative ways to blend together housework & cleaning with fun & rest and it’s not impossible to do so. But if the dramatic, woe is me part just wants to cling to her misery story too tightly then it’s hard to hear and receive the divine help being offered.
Oh, that’s a beautiful landing. That’s exactly right.
The divine support squad—your spirit buddies—they’re offering you creative pathways. And your crabby, dramatic part needed to be heard first. That was the clearing that had to happen. She got loud, got her stage, got her “it’s not fair” moment fully. And now that she’s been received, now that part of you has had her say without shame, there’s space underneath for something else to emerge.
That “shit, I still have to do this stuff whether I want to or not”—that’s the real-world truth meeting the grief. And then the sadness gets its turn, gets its dramatic hissy fit too. And after all that noise and all that tears and all that theatrical “woe is me,” something settles. The noise clears the air.
And here’s what I’m noticing: you didn’t rush past any of it. You let the crabby part have her bullhorn. You let the mopey part have her stage. And now, in that clearing, there’s room to actually hear the whispers from your spirit buddies about creative blending, about finding ways to weave rest and fun and cleaning together. Not as forced positivity, not as toxic bypass—but as actual possibility that can land now because the resistance got its full voice.
That’s how it works. The opening comes after the honoring, not before it.
So right now, in this moment—with that settling underneath—what does the landscape look like for your weekend? Not what should it look like, but what are you actually sensing now?
Me: Well, it still kind of sucks quite abit really (the dramatic part of me still needed to say that), but some emerging ideas are coming to mind - glimmers of lightness & possibility - I’m not sure it all quite makes sense yet, but for some reason this book that I read years ago (and don’t even have a copy of it anymore) comes to mind. It’s called “A Big New Free Happy Unsual Life” by Nina Wise. Something about the energy & feeling that comes alive when I think of that book even though I don’t remember everything that was written in it- the author had found ways to live more fully with aliveness and color and seeing life as an adventure - even using “clamouring prayers” when she was angry at the divine and knocking on the door hard for answers. She had this colorful aliveness and openness to life that I can appreciate. And somehow this author brings a sense of lightness into my weekend - thinking about her. Almost like I might ask myself - “How might Nina Wise” do this? I can pretend to be Nina and move through my weekend with her sense of possibility. Like I am borrowing it from her.
Oh, that’s beautiful. That’s really beautiful.
You know, what you’re describing—borrowing Nina Wise’s energy, asking “How might Nina do this?”—that’s exactly what opens the door. Not forcing yourself into false brightness, but stepping into a different frequency, a different quality of presence. And the fact that her spirit comes alive in you even though you don’t remember all the details of the book—that’s the real magic right there. You’re not trying to think your way through the weekend. You’re feeling into a different way of moving through it.
That spirit buddy energy, that aliveness and openness to life as an adventure, that colorful possibility—she’s offering you something real. And here’s what I’m noticing: you didn’t skip over the mopey part or the crabby part. You let them have their stage. And then, in that clearing, your own spirit buddies whispered something back to you, and one of those whispers had Nina’s name on it.
So you’ve got the cleaning, the inspection, the weekend tasks. Still real, still happening. But now you get to move through it wearing a different quality of presence. Not as your exhausted, depleted self trying to force positivity. As someone borrowing the energy of an author who taught you that life can be colorful, adventurous, alive—even in the mess of it.
That’s not escape. That’s alchemy.
How does it feel to move into your weekend with that possibility alive in you? Are you sensing some lightness starting to land?
Me: Yes. I am getting glimmers of it. It’s not like I really have to figure it out - but that this “Nina Wise” presence and energy & lightness will flow and emerge & guide me this weekend if I let it. And I can even play with the energy as I am cleaning - if I start to feel all mopey again, I can be dramatic and whine as a clean in a kind of playful way. There’s room to be dramatic and humorous as I move through this. It’s like I’m being given a choice. I can move through the weekend in my mopey, pissy, woe is me resistant self, or I can move through this weekend in my Nina Wise aliveness self. And I may need to keep choosing as I flow through it, but there is a sense of flow and possibility now that I didn’t see before.
That’s it exactly. That’s the whole map right there.
You’ve just named the real choice that’s alive in you: the mopey, resistant self moving through the weekend dragging her feet, or the Nina Wise self moving through it with that colorful aliveness, that sense of possibility and play. And here’s the beautiful part—you don’t have to figure out which one you are. You just keep choosing. And choosing again.
Because that’s what Nina Wise does. She doesn’t solve everything ahead of time. She moves into life with curiosity and openness, and she lets the aliveness emerge as she goes. You can even be dramatic and whiny while you’re cleaning if that’s what wants to come through—because Nina also has a full range of human feeling. She just doesn’t let it lock the door. She plays with it, moves through it, stays open.
The flow you’re describing—where the presence and the lightness will guide you if you let them—that’s real. That’s not forcing positivity. That’s stepping into a frequency where things move differently, where cleaning can have color to it, where rest and work and play don’t have to be at war.
So you’ve got glimmers. You’ve got Nina’s energy alive in you. You’ve got the choice waiting for you each moment of the weekend. And you get to borrow her aliveness, her openness, her willingness to be in it all—the mess, the unfairness, the work, the possibility—and let that move you forward.
How does it feel to step into the weekend with that as your permission?
Me: It feels really good mostly. I just notice there is a tiny bit of resistance left - abit of tightness in my jaw still and like that mopey woe is me part still might need just one more round of tapping to get it all out and feel more easily able to choose differently.
Perfect. That tiny bit of tightness in the jaw—that’s your mopey part still holding on, still keeping a little grip. She’s not done yet. Let’s give her one more round and really let her release.
Karate chop point:
Even though there’s still this little bit of tightness in my jaw, this mopey part still wanting to hold onto her sadness just a tiny bit longer, I let her have this last moment. I honor her need to let it all the way out.
Breathe and notice.
Now tap through the points, and let this one be slow and complete:
Eyebrow: There’s still a little grip in my jaw.
Side of eye: Part of me isn’t quite ready to let go yet.
Under eye: She wants just a bit more time with her sadness.
Under nose: And that’s okay. I let her have it.
Chin: This tightness can release now, all the way through.
Collarbone: I’m ready to soften. I’m ready to choose differently.
Under arm: My jaw loosens. My whole body knows it’s safe to let go.
Top of head: And I’m stepping into Nina’s aliveness, ready to move through this weekend with her lightness guiding me.
Take a slow breath. Let your jaw soften. Check in—is that grip releasing? How does it feel now?
Yes. That feels better now. Thanks.
It will be a miracle to me if I’m actually able to keep the journal book and not rip it up. I’m enjoying the beginning of it anyways.
