What makes a belief… “Limiting” ??
A limiting belief is one that blocks you, in some way, from thriving. When you want to express yourself, it holds back your energy and zaps your eagerness back into suppression.
Limiting beliefs also tend to be… overly vague… and mean. That’s a way to spot one.
For example, “I’m not good enough!” That is absolutely a limiting belief.
It’s vague. Are you not good enough (a swimmer to swim the English Channel, or swim across a pool)? See, when made less vague, we can more easily point to a truth. I cannot swim the English Channel. I can almost always swim across a pool. I choose not to swim in the Arctic. I’m not suicidal so I wouldn’t try to swim from California to Hawaii.
If I had never swum before, it’s true I wouldn’t be good enough (a swimmer) to swim in many places without a life preserver and even supervision.
It’s mean to tell someone they are not good enough in such vague terms. It’s cruel, even. Yet, I’ve worked with so many whose parent(s) said that to them – and now their inner critic has taken up the belief.
How about, “You’ll never amount to anything.” Well, that’s vague and mean.
Or, “Life has to be a struggle.” How are we defining life? If something is hard but we actually enjoy it, must we make it into a struggle?
Vague, generalized suppression is where limiting beliefs hang out. Because we’ve often been brainwashed by others, they “feel true” in our body – but “true” only in the sense that they feel normal – The Way Things Just Are.
But not True as in having the tone and texture and brilliance of divine YES, grounded in Freedom and Possibility!
I remember someone who was told over and over they would never succeed. It felt so true! We used EFT Tapping on the attitude and energy of those who told them that – with such arrogance and put down. Those Meanies! (tap tap tap)
Then we mapped out together two “views” on success. What became so clear was that it’s true, they would never be a “success” according to how the Meanies viewed what made a person successful.
But they were already a success measured in how they define what matters!
Limiting beliefs are handed down from person to person, sometimes with “well-meaning intentions” and sometimes with, well, cruelty towards us and our actual unique gifts.
Without conscious skill and attention, limiting beliefs can block us for a lifetime.
Thriving benefits from having real skill shifting our limiting beliefs. Clearing them (at least enough to move forward!) makes all the difference.
It can even be fun! That’s how Cathy and I treat it, with respect for the impact they’ve had… blended with rebellion and sass.
That gets the energy to move. And like it or not, even if we inherited (and internalized them) from others, they are OUR beliefs now. It takes our emotional labor to clear them.
If clearing your blocks including limiting beliefs appeals to you, join us! I’d recommend you join our Emotional Freedom Circle. If you’re not quite ready for that, join us Sunday just for the workshop. See if you like our style and approach.
There’s amazing freedom and choice on the other side of these blocks…
Replay is below
P.S. Adira says, “Just because it blocks your way doesn’t mean it has to STOP you… or me! Whee!”
